I was so hyper independent I would’ve rather crawled across broken glass naked-
Then to ever trust anyone in every sense again.
I have the capacity to love deeper than most people do.
The glass would hurt less.
And I spend my days staying as busy as possible.
Work outs.
Puzzles.
Summer activities.
I mentally tire myself out-
The faster I fall asleep the less time I have to get stuck in the past,
The less opportunities I have to hurt my own feelings.
And you’re so caring it hurts;
Minimum words and maximum emotional impacts that leave my heart wondering how I ever thought anywhere else was home-
I find myself tethered to you on deeper levels than I ever thought imaginable.
It should terrify me more than it does.
Sometimes it does.
Loving someone this deeply means admitting there are places in me I can’t protect from loss-
But I’ve spent enough years confusing walls with safety.
I don’t want to survive love anymore,
I want to live inside it.
And so now the girl who would’ve crawled on glass naked to be hyper independent-
Would do it just to share the weight of the world with you.
You’d never make me, though.
