Beautifully written poem! The only thing I think might help the reader is if you broke it up into stanzas. It would be a little easier to read! It just my opinion though! You did an amazing job. I look forward to reading more or your poetry! Hope you'll post more soon! Take Care! Brooke~ =)
The ideas are great but I have a few suggestions:
â€œwhenever a garden's tendedâ€ Maybe â€œtoâ€ should be after tended.
The commas and periods after each line arenâ€™t really necessary either.
You should do a spell check. But more importantly you shouldnâ€™t use shortened words like â€œcuzâ€ in your poetry. That can some times give people the wrong impression of you. I donâ€™t read poetry when people write like that and many others within this site feel the same way, so just keep that in mind.
Also to make the poem flow better and a little easier to read you could break the poem up into stanzas. That would help a lot I think.
You are the writer and I can only give suggestions. It's your call...
I really did like this piece as it offers so much love and will make the reader smile. Iâ€™d say very good startâ€¦and youâ€™ll only get better with time. Nice write! :)
Well thats a great start for your first poem on here! I truly loved your poem. Stanza's may help but your poem not having stanza's also makes it differnent from everybody elses. Stanza's would break it up more and make your point more clear... but is def. the writers choice. I think it reads fine without them. So keep up the good writing oyur off to a great start!