I reallly love the message of this poem and the flow is great 5.>>>>>>

OMG that was awesome!! i like how you set out that poem, with the when in every line and then a line to finish the verse off and how u changed the ending verse to never. I came across one bit that i don't really think made sense.. "When all tries to break free end up in failure again" ... i might have just read it wrong though, so if there's nothing wrong with it just excuse me!! i absoulutely loved the ending sentence, it was so clever! It made it such a strong and powerful ending. 5/5 :) well done keep up the good work!! xox