Comments : Tracing Infinity

  • 18 years ago

    by Lenny

    Wow, that was fantastic, you create such a romantic feeling and then it flows so well into the end where shes gone, it reads itself and is addictive, enticing, entrancing and a whole relationship in one poem. Just one thing the line 'fingers running thru each and every silky strand of your hair' seems to be a little too detailed, but otherwise it is an exquisite piece that I'd love to see published.

  • 18 years ago

    by Jamie

    Okay i did enjoy reading this your vocabulary is right on...very well done

    i sit here caressing the part of yourself that you left with me, the part of myself you chose to neglect

    those were the best lines i think

    okay since the format you chose to write this poem (no stanzas) did make this difficult to read i could really tell what you were trying to do with the rhyme scheme or if you were even trying to have one...i thought i could sense some rhyming at the beggining and end but hard to tell

    so the only real advice i can give to this poem that could be of any help is perhaps put it into stanzas that way it is actually more readable and what not...

  • 18 years ago

    by kiesha

    Oh wow, that was really amazing. The only thing I didn't like about your poem was that it's kind of hard to read, just being in that one paragraph. I don't know if you meant it to be that way, but it might be better if you divided it up. Besides that, I think you expressed this poem beautifully. Take care.
    > Kiesha

  • 18 years ago

    by shawn hoskins

    5/5 it was very good you got some big words in there

  • 18 years ago

    by brittany

    Wat to go i love it:)

  • 18 years ago

    by brittany

    Wat to go i love it:)

  • 18 years ago

    by Ana Vidovic

    I have read a lot of amazing poems on this site. A lot very deep and meaningful ones. But i must say, this is my favorite. Just wow... i dont know what it is about this piece... it captivates every part of me. Its like a beautiful dream and i can relate with this so much. You have this incredible talent and i can feel your personality seeping through the words of this poem. It is just beautiful, your words... everything. Exquisite and i dont know why it touched me so much, because ive read so many and none have touched me like this. It filled me with emotion. Never stop writing, you're a truly gifted person. If you want u can read one of mine too. Again, brilliant work.

    Btw.. thats an amazing pic in your profile. Did you draw that? I love to draw, its beautiful.

    Ana

  • 18 years ago

    by Ariana

    I don't read poems that aren't in stanza form, infact this is the first poem I've ever read on here that is not in a 'format', but the first line made me want to read more. You have captured and portrayed your feelings so well here, everything is tangible, and I think setting it out like this works well because it reads like a stream of conciousness - an excellent poem :)