Comments : Broken

  • 18 years ago

    by Justin

    Great poem you can tell it means alot to you. Its very good

  • 18 years ago

    by master of shadow

    Amazing poem. very well writen well expressed and full of feeling.

  • 18 years ago

    by alwaysremeniceus

    Love this poem, its very expressive and very easy to relate to...
    nightmare turn to reality... i guess reality can be something made up of either dreams or nightmares... depending how things go... but have you ever thought, a nightmare gets overshadowed by a dream... then you start losing your dream, and theres only more nightmares coming... :/... its kinda horrible

  • 18 years ago

    by Katlynn

    Amazing job. I would have to say i love at the ending how your nightmare might become your reality. But this is a really sad poem i would have to say. But i really hope your going to be okay and i hope this is not a true true poem at all if you need anyone i'm here. You did an amazing job and thanks for the comment on my poem. keep it up. keep on writing. love always and forever.

  • 18 years ago

    by Once an Angel

    "i'll never show how i really feel
    unless you're someone i trust
    you'll never see a single tear shed
    in public my pain turns to dust
    but no matter what i lead you to believe
    inside i am crying silently
    for i know if things keep going this way
    my nightmare will become my reality"

    This section is very similar to how I feel and it saddens me that you feel that way too. If you will let me in whatever way I can, I would want to be someone for you to talk to and to trust. I know I am just online, but that is the best I can do for now. If I can help in anyway to mend you broken bloodied heart, please don't hesitate to ask. Great poem. I love you babe!

    -Mikochan

  • 18 years ago

    by Darien

    Lots of feeling in this poem. Very sad, but a good write. Thanks for sharing.

  • 18 years ago

    by Wintersolstice

    Im a big fan now lol X
    Have to say I cant find much fault in this. Some of the rhymes were a bit fourced but because the poem was good I recon you got away with it.

  • 18 years ago

    by Jason Meres

    Superbly done. Might be even better with some simple formatting, but the content itself is solid and described expertly.

  • 18 years ago

    by Jerry Scott

    Feel your pain. I'd like to see it formatted differently.

  • 18 years ago

    by firexflys

    Wow i know just how this feels i have been here then i met some one who could se past everything and i havent been happier dont giev up hun i like your stuff i an add you to my fav's then read more 5.5

  • 18 years ago

    by Jamie

    I liked this a lot you kept your flow and rhyming constant thoughout the whole thing, the only part i thought was weird was the very last line the nightmare will become your reality....isn't it already your reality? because i don't think you were talking about just a dream you were having so that really dosnt make sense but other then that 5.5 great poem

  • 18 years ago

    by LadyPearl

    Excellent job, tons of emotion.

  • 18 years ago

    by Dana.

    Wow, that is a really great poem its almost like you took the thoughts right out of my head but anyways it was good and keep it up.....

    -Dana

  • 18 years ago

    by LadyPearl

    Pretty good, you can still improve on your flow. But nice details, keep it up

  • 18 years ago

    by .

    Wow...so much emotion! This was really good! 5/5
    Becky
    xoxo

  • 18 years ago

    by Emma

    I loved it. it was a really great poem and it wasnt that long. or it didnt seem like it because it was so well written.
    nice job
    Emma 5/5

  • 18 years ago

    by obsessedgurl

    So heartfelt.. I really enjoyed this piece..

  • 18 years ago

    by Loulou

    Wow i like this one the best excellent job and i love the flow you are an amazing writer i will be looking forward to reading more of yours

    love always tabby

  • 18 years ago

    by Michelle

    Awwww.... don't give up... if ya need sum 1 to listen, i'm here for ya.. ok ? don't forget.

    big hugs,
    michelle

  • 18 years ago

    by Patrick

    Greeting, you entered my contest a long time ago and I never got the chance to award you your winnings and say congrats.

    First things first, as for this the winning poem I have to say I just loved it. The emotion with the expression through words was just splendid. You did a wonderful job getting your point past.

    My favorite line would have to be those last 2, I mean they just really get you.

    However, I believe that while this poem is wonderful there are several improvements that could be made. Nothing to big, just to make it flow better. You simply need to proof read. Its nothing that I could really say change this and it will all be better. You just need to go through and if you alter a few words, take some things out and add more this poems will be much better.

    Although don't think I am saying its not good, because it is and I loved it.

    5/5, West