Comments : Underwater

  • 17 years ago

    by LadyPearl

    Very description! I like your use of imagery and metaphors.

  • 17 years ago

    by Fallen Angel

    The use of metaphor and imagery is again stunning. I'm not entirely sure what I can say about this except that I'm amazed that this poem had such a low rating. I guess most people don't have the capacity or perhaps the inclination to understand your poetry and when it goes over their heads they think it isn't very good...well they're wrong, it's amazing and if this quality pervades all your work then I think that you are seriously under-rated. Superb writing 5/5 x

  • 17 years ago

    by Samantha

    Well, that's just awesome. :) I lost MY ability to put words together because of your amazing ability to put them together.
    "Into perches where we'd sit upon and kiss"
    "upon" doesn't seem to be the right choice, perhaps it's because it's redundant (obviously you'd be upon the perches if you are sitting there). I don't exactly know how to explain what I'm saying but I'm hoping you'll understand.

    Anyway, if that's the only "mistake" (even if it's my mistake), then you are one heck of a writer, my friend.

  • 17 years ago

    by Lenny

    Oooh I love that. The constant theme worked into pretty much every line, the link to the snake as a metaphor for your other metaphor. Its deliciously rich in its imagery, and just a pleasure to read. There, once more, is nothing to say.