Panic attacks kill

Her eyes wont open and her bodies shaking
Her lungs wont breathe and her head is aching

Her stomachs is turning and she cant move
Her ears are ringing and your voice cant soothe

She hangs up and yet still she cries
She pretends shes okay but its a lie

Her panic is reaching and her life is flashing
The thoughts cave in and her world is crashing

But pill wont help she has to be strong
Its the way it is she cant be wrong

They all have must believe and they all will
Even when she breaks her smile will stay still

Because they cant know shes not as perfect as can be
She must keep this image and so let down they wont be

So theyll believe that shes not a mistake
And she doesnt sleep when her heart breaks

So maybe theyll say, good job!, or even, youre great!
So for once she could feel accomplished and not like a fake

So maybe shell even start to believe
Shes something more than a body that breathes

So she keeps it inside as she cries on her bed
Gasping for air banging her head

But shes alone no and no one knows
Shed give the world to stop blood flow

And shed kill herself if it would help
But it would just sc*re*w up something else

So she keeps quiet and pretends shes alright
But she stays up fighting all night

But still shes thinks that they dont care
And it wont matter if shes not there

But there is one and she loves him
But shell fu*ck that up soon again

And then shell be completely alone
Fighting herself staring at the phone

And no one will call because shell the third wheel
And no one cares if her heart beat is still

And then shell die alone in mid breathe
From a knife placed squarely direct in her chest

And then theyll all know she hid it all
And theyll all find out her pain wasnt small

And they wont care theyll simply say
I thought she was perfect, I wonder what got in her way?

And theyll all be disappointed and theyll all cry
Because she couldnt keep it all hidden inside

But soon theyll forget and simply move on
And Ill be nothing but someone gone

And they wont care that I will still cry
And even in heaven Ill still lie

Pretending Im okay and panic attacks dont kill
And I was perfect on earth and perfect still

But for now Im alive and this doesnt matter
And my thoughts dont make sense for my brain is scattered

And Im still hoping, gasping, longing for air
Hoping soon someone will be there

And Ill be okay and I wont have to fake
This world of mine that I create

And then maybe Ill stop crying and Ill give in
And be happy and truly laugh again

But for now Im going to smile and pretend Im strong
Because no one can know that Im wrong

*This is how I feel right now. Thanks for readin. It would mena a lot if you commented or voted. Thanks for reading. Always-
Shatted and Broken*