Truth Or Fiction?

by Torn   Jun 27, 2006


As every blow of pain attacks me
I remember my stolen past.
I feel like something has been taken away,
Something that was meant to last.

I find myself making up stories,
Those feel so real to me.
I start crying and I feel the pain,
Etched deep within my memory.

When I wake up I wonder,
What was truth or fiction?
Like living a double identity,
Filled with contradiction.

Not knowing where I've been,
Unable to determine right from wrong.
I pull at my hair and I scream,
This nightmare has been real for too long.

While I'm trapped in my own company,
There's so much bottled up in me.
I learn to resent and loath myself,
And disguise myself so they don't see.

If anyone knew the thoughts I think,
The sick memories I re-enact.
When I lay broken on the floor,
They tend to think it's an act.

If anyone could see the pain,
That's spreading through my veins.
No amount of scar tissue,
Could equal the feeling of being slain.

If anyone could hear me calling,
So loud, for someone to hold.
To know I am not all alone,
Abandoned in the cold.

Confusion and pain is where I end up,
The very place I always start.
This tug-a-war between lives,
Is literally pulling me apart.

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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by Sungrl And Mrs Whatsit

    Hi...It's me, formerly from long, long ago, 'Sungrl'....remember??

    Truth is I'm really a great-gramma and hardly ever come on here anymore...just passin' through and doing a rare posting...
    I got to wondering about you recently...
    I, of course,prefer to think (read hope) this piece is more fiction than truth, but mainly....
    hope you're OK...
    These are tough times all around really, so being even "OK" is a real ongoing work of commitment to ideals, mental self-control, and higher spiritual ground...
    I certainly know personally..and being around children helps me very much to stay focussed...
    Warm Good Will and Very Best of Wishes To You, Anna..........'-)

  • 15 years ago

    by Once an Angel

    Hey beautiful I know I already commented on this one, but I wanted you to know that I stole your title for this poem for one of mine, lol, but I give you credit. I was looking for inspiration for a poem for my Creative writing class. Also, thank you very much for your sweet, comment. You are indeed an angel. *hugs*

    -Ellie

  • 17 years ago

    by Once an Angel

    I found a poem of yours that i hadn't commented on, and wow, I missed out before. I love you sweetheart. I don't know if you will get this message, because it seems you haven't been on in a while, but if you do just know that. I know we don't live in visiting distance from eachother, and I am sorry I can't be there for you in the flesh. baby, are you okay? Just, drop me a line some time. Did you visit ryl? Are things getting any better? I really hope so. As always, a heart renching poem. Huggles sweetheart.

    -Tainted

  • 17 years ago

    by michelle

    This poem does speak from the heart,and i am in the same position.please read some of my poems,if u get the chance.this is exactly how i feel,reading that is like reading my scrap book of thoughts.its great..take care hun x x

  • 17 years ago

    by Rich

    You have such passion and strength! Your writing only shows how strong and powerful you really are! How beautiful! How magnificent! You writing captures the pain of life...

    Rich