Comments : Celestial tears

  • 11 years ago

    by ShhhhItsASecret©

    4/5. Good poem. Flow was a bit studdered, but I guess that's because you end your lined in the middle. I suggest stopping the line at the end of the line. I know that doesn't make sense... but like here's an example:

    Instead of:

    "On a warm summer night
    I listened as the rain beat rhythms
    crying ,not wanting to see the light
    a broken heart , for the loss of
    someone dear, nature bringing
    forth emotions through her stream of celestial tears. As I "

    Try something like:

    "On a warm summer night
    I listened as the rain beat rhythms
    crying ,not wanting to see the light
    a broken heart , for the loss of someone dear,
    nature bringing forth emotions
    through her stream of celestial tears."

    I dunno, it would make the poem sound a bit more put together, for lack of a better word. I'm trying to find the word, but I can't seem to find it... I hate when that happens... Anyway, the poem was good. Keep writing!!

    ~BJ~

  • 11 years ago

    by Carol

    I very much liked this poem, but i also agree that it can sound more put together. keep writing!

  • 11 years ago

    by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

    A very gentle yet sad poem... I'm not sure what to say about it, but I loved it.

    xDarkSuicidex 5.5

  • 11 years ago

    by Loulou

    I like this one alot. It is my favorite so far. I love the meaning of it it is beautiful. excellent excellent!!!!

  • 11 years ago

    by SomeDaysDreamer

    Thanks for the comment, i loved this poem, it was so beautiful and i could easily relate, you rule!

  • 11 years ago

    by facedownindirt

    This is really really good. I would have to say I agree with BJ though, but that doesn't take away at the good work you've put together. I've only read this one poem of yours so far, but already I can tell that you're a wonderful writer. = ] Keep up the good work!

    p.s. Thank you so much for all of the comments you've left me! I really needed to read them and see what someone thought. So thanks again, they ment a lot to me.

  • 11 years ago

    by ricky

    First one of yours i've read. And it is a good one. I will read the rest of yours.

  • 11 years ago

    by Jin

    I LOVE This one!!!!! It has a very good flow of words. It makes you think of Emily Dikinson (I know the last name is spelled wrong but, the site wouldn't let me write it correctly , hehehehe it says there is an inappropriate word)!!!!
    Anyway, GREAT WORK!!!!! You are very talented!! =)

  • 11 years ago

    by Silent Screams

    Wow, that was amazing you really now how to make poems flow together well
    it's soooo good
    auna

  • 11 years ago

    by StMario

    I love this..... it paints a picture in my mind leaving me with the thought of what was on your mind when you wrote it. it was heart felt....

  • 11 years ago

    by Steven Odenbreit

    I think this is a very well written poem. The rhyming was great and it had a nice easy flow, a good read. 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Todd

    My favorite thus far. I love the rain, almost hear when I read.

  • 10 years ago

    by xPerfect Chaosx

    Such a pretty poem!! I liked it!! Good choice of words!!! lol!! Keep up the awesome work!!
    Much love,
    ~*Danielle*~

  • 10 years ago

    by Cindy

    Wow Beautiful! This was so nice. the picture it painted was so nice yet sad. Love van be one of the most wonderful things in life yet also one of the most painful. Excellent!

  • 10 years ago

    by maynes

    I agree with everyone else, it is a good love poem, I'm not very used to the structure of the whole poem in a stanza, so the flow was kind of interrupted at one point, but other than that, it was good. Keep up the good work.

  • 10 years ago

    by Independence Forever

    Very insightful and deep. a great poem with all the necessary attachments.

    your servant:
    david

  • 10 years ago

    by jazmazollicoffer

    I really enjoyed your poem and thanks for commenting on my work i hope to read more from you

  • 10 years ago

    by Nick who Plays Pool

    Nice poem, I can see why it's your feature poem, 5/5 :D

  • 10 years ago

    by Nick who Plays Pool

    I've gone through all your poems and this one is your best. Your first poem will always be your greatest. 5/5 and I'm done commenting and rating all your poems :)

  • 10 years ago

    by .K.i.T.t.Y.

    This was a beautifully written poem. it had so much to it. the imagery and idea was beautiful the title even captured my attention! 5/5.