Great job on this poem, you are very good with words, keep up they great work :) look forward to reading more of your work.
thanks for the comment
xx rachel xx

Lets see.. u want some suggestions.. ? well i have one.. (by the way, i luved ur poem, nothing was wrong with it.. i have one suggestion on how to put it all together.. but u dont have to listen.. )
you know how u have two lines, and then the last word rhymes? well here.. just an idea...

This girl will never leave our minds,
Shes always dancing in our heads,
Never did we begin to think this,
Thought would lead us to her death..

like four lines.. just to mix it up.. i luved ur poem.. cant wait for more.. great work

I liked it.

GREAT POEM!!! I looove the feeling of this poem. I love the point! I think that people need to see this kind of thing. Because things like that happen in real life. too many people are being fake and it leads to problems for them and others!

5/5

Loved the wording and the poem itself :)

Wow!
I loved this.
I really, really enjoyed the imagery and I enjoyed the rhyme scheme and flow very much.
A very good job.

Wow good poem..i almost cried!! :( .lol...5/5 keep writing!!