BETRAY FROME THE ONES WE LOVE, LEFT ALONE!

[ From ..not frome. ]

I dunno if it's just me or not, but was this intended to be lyrics? Cause I thought so... I could be wrong though.

Nicely done though. I loved the first stanza, it was great. Keep it up!

Natalie``

These line really kept my attention
If we comitted suicide today,
Would it be for good intentions or would it be to betray?

ur poetry is really great! keep it up,
love mel

I don't really know what to say about this poem. in a way i liked it but in a way i didn't there was just something about it that didnt catch my eye like it should have. i give you a 4/5 only because some of it was kind of off and some of it wasn't!

"I have caused you pain.
I should not be able to love you again.
My tears how they rain.
Today I feel no pain."

The 2nd line in that poem was way too long, there was too many syllables. Try, "I shouldn't love you again"

"BETRAY FROME THE ONES"
[From]

This was an interesting poem. The rhymes were good, except that 'misery' didn't rhyme with the other words. Good stuff though.

I just read this and your TEENAGE ANTHEM poem. wow. I luv it. this is Henry Rollins intellectual punk-ish.

keep it up

Patrice is right whats the point