Comments : Desolate Truth

  • 11 years ago

    by Jessica

    Omg, Taleee.. You are just too good.. Lol.. Wow.. This was great as well.. I loved the repitiition of "Desolate Truth" it added effect.. Why are all your poems so sad sweetie? You okay? Great job, Ily! 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Wings Of Flames

    Awww.
    so sad
    5/5
    "Hi nat!"
    lol
    cya roun'
    ~Emah

  • 11 years ago

    by Darien

    Very interesting poem Nat. For some reason, the first line didn't connect with me. "salt tongues," I think it was because you should have wrote 'salted' I guess it's more of a present/pass tense issue. Lol, but the rest of the poem was great. I sort of miss that free-style type poem, where you wrote what ever came to mind. *sigh* Oh well, this type still just boggles my mind.

  • 11 years ago

    by Lady Nik

    Really good poem shanik

  • 11 years ago

    by Catastrophic Beauty

    Excellent poem. I loved the rhyming scheme you used, how the 3rd && 4th lines in each stanza rhymed, that was different-in a good way. I also loved your choice of words
    "
    Gold lingered on silky smooth skin,
    Synthetic portrait failed attempts,
    Bathroom odors filled the clear airs,
    Reflections tormented weak mind,
    Desolate truth reaching in despair."
    ^^
    Excellent imagery in that stanza.

    Overall a great poem with wonderful rhyming && flow to it. [5/5]..I don't think there's anything I would change about this poem.

  • 11 years ago

    by dora

    U always write ur poems so unique ike my eyes always like open wen i read ur work theyre ike really good and intresting to read. keep em coming xx

  • 11 years ago

    by Roxy

    I loved this stanza especually!!

    Gold lingered on silky smooth skin,
    Synthetic portrait failed attempts,
    Bathroom odors filled the clear airs,
    Reflections tormented weak mind,
    Desolate truth reaching in despair.

    It was great you show confidance in the poem yet it is sad great jog.
    xoxroxyxox

  • 11 years ago

    by xxEvilAngelxx

    Beautifully written and flawless.

  • 11 years ago

    by ModernDavinci

    This is good. =] and sad. =[

  • 11 years ago

    by sweetiepie18

    Superb. you are very gifted.

  • 11 years ago

    by Colin Chau

    Wow...i wish i could articulate like that.. =)

  • 11 years ago

    by Idiosyncratic

    The flow in this poem is notably better than the rest of your poems, though I don't like the word choice very much. I'm also not quite grasping the meaning. I don't think this poem is as good as your others... 4/5.

  • 11 years ago

    by Tammie

    Again, wow! The imagery in this poem is amazing, you used the perfect words to describe this story. Very sad. I love how you used the repetition of Desolate Truth in the last line of every stanza, it made it stronger. Great work! =] 5/5

    Tammie xo

  • 11 years ago

    by awww

    Wow... thats all i can say.. haha... well im gona try to put my feelings into words... it was great... the words you used were deep... loved the way you repeated the title... unique... flow and imagery were great... keep writing! love your poems!

    ~angel~

  • 11 years ago

    by Arcane Blondie

    You're such a talented poet! I love all your work. This wasn't one of my favorites, but it's still a good write; very sad... 5/5