Comments : My tears =)

  • 16 years ago

    by lish

    This is a well written poem, i love the wording and feeling in this poem
    well done

  • 16 years ago

    by lish

    This is a well written poem, i love the wording and feeling in this poem
    well done

  • 16 years ago

    by EssenceOfLace

    Okay i really did like this poem. you were very good at getting your point across. i do have a few suggestions for this:

    "They'd tell you, how my head
    Is confusing for a lot of things

    They'd tell you, all my thought of self
    And my wishes, my life would end..."

    I think it would look better as

    "They'd tell you, how my head
    Is confused for so many reasons

    They'd tell you, all my thoughts
    And my wish, of my life would end..."

    and then maybe if you added at the end

    "If only my tears could speak...."

    Just what i think would make the poem sound better.
    but over all i really did like the poem.
    5/5