The idea for this basically came after a typo of sunshine. I twisted the words a little, and you'll find that the "nature" words sound fairly alike to the ones that start the next line.

So good! wonderful imagery! definately not a typical 13 yr olds poem. excellent write. this contains so much. strength, self-recognition, sadness, color... awesome! 5 for you! -beav

Thanks so much!!!!

Creative and have powerful words
I liked especially those

Breezes turn too hollow
Freezing days are to come
I try to end this cruel world
But my pain is not yet done

Keep it up
Laura

Thanks everyone so much!

This is an awesome poem!! Such great
imagery! I particurlary like this part:

Rain turns to emptyness
Pain flies in my hair
Multicolored rainbows
Cascade with great despair

It just flows so wonderfully! Great write! 5/5
Much Love,
.:Danielle:.

Thanks a lot!

Thanks!

Your imagery is so sharp. i enjoyed te outlook. 5/5.

Thank you so much!

Absolutely beautiful, I wanted to put a line that I liked in particular, but there are so many. This written with so much beauty and I loved how you used nature as a metaphor for what you're expressing. Excellent work!

~jas~

I wouldn't normally like a poem like this, but this one was truly amazing, the imagery and fluency was so clever.

i think the title was truly original and i loved the extended metaphor within this.

You, to, have a great way with words. I could read the great emotions in this poem.

I loved the stanza

`Rain turns to emptyness
Pain flies in my hair
Multicolored rainbows
Cascade with great despair`

Your 13? That is hard to believe because you write in such a great way. Keep it up!!

I'm glad this poem had structure
The vocabulary was okay
The message was pretty good
the way you saud things was nice
the last stanza ended it well
I wish it were longer
5/5
kaila

Great write as usual 5/5 from me