Oh-My-God...really i mean thats like all there is to say, like i mean WoW. Great poem ---the flow and diction were really good, the subject...well---beautifuly writien on a subject that i would think would be hard to write on, but you pulled it off. i look forward to reading more of you work. 5/5
Dude I really like this. Absolutely favorite stanza was
Verse after verse malicious words begin to appear
Hastily creating torturous scenes as if he didn't care
The words bled onto the paper but no pen was found
Hands working frantically and the pen on the ground
Awesome write! ^_^
Wow, your poems are always so good. the flow was off in the beginning, it just took me a second to get into the rhythm of the poem that's all. grammatically, you always use a great vocab, which is one of the things i love most about your poems. wonderful job again, i really enjoyed it, as always. 5/5 def.
"In the fourth verse tears were pouring from his eyes
Streaming down his face onto the paper as he cries
But those tears turned into angry words as he wrote
His impaired thoughts were wishing to slit her throat"
This stanza hit me good and hard...so much anger and emotion. I loved how it flowed.
I loved the darkness created here. It was perfect. The flow was good, although sometimes it felt like I had to rush the words in my head to keep the flow equal. I liked the words though, and how what you were saying in the poem, seemed to actually produce itself in YOUR actual poem. If that makes any sense at all, haha. I just liked how you were saying how the words turn more malicious, and you were highlighting this by changing the tone of your actual poem, too.
Darien! Man, this poem gave me the chills. Lol...or maybe I'm just cold. hehe. Anyways, I love the description you used when each 'verse' was written. Excellent use of words. It was like I could picture everything going on. And the ending...it was just perfect. I dunno what to say. Amazing write! I didn't know your poems were so good. Haha. Never stop writing! 5/5
WOW. Darien, I'd forgotten how amazing your poems were. This was FANTASTIC. I loved every word of it. Your descriptions were excellent, your rhymes worked brilliantly, and I loved the little twists you had hidden in it. Amazing poem, definetely a 5/5. I'm going to vote this to win the weekly contest. Very nicely done.
This whole piece is so well written....great flow and rhyme. The ending was awesome!
Finally he wrote the last verse with utmost perfection
His poem had taken a twist but he liked the direction
It paralleled his emotions and also made him think
Next time he writes he will use blood instead of ink