Oh the story this told was amazing! the depth and story line behind this was intense!

5/5 David

Ohh the story was so nice... im sure all readers would literally empathize this poet. well people have different opinion but for me i like this one

Nice poem :) keep up the good work! it flowed well! by the way thanks for the comment :) TC

Very nice. Most lines transitioned very smoothly. I couldn't find much to pick at (though I tried). My comments are merely suggestions since, like I said, it seems very well fleshed out.

line 2: 'got' is extremely un-descriptive. 'stepped? or some other verb.

I found the punctuation distracting at times (comma at the end of 3rd stanza, and periods at the end of 4th and 5th broke the flow)

though I liked the 8th stanza

hope that was in any way useful. :\

This is so sad!!! it flowed so perfectly though, and the penning was gorgeous.. and you wrote again!!! you really need to write more often, cause you really are a very talented writer... 5/5 keep it up
xoxo
gabriella

Your really good at rhyming. I'm rubbish at that. Brilliant poem!

Oh that was so sad.. Flow was great.. 5/5

Wow! Amazing, sad poem.....the flow was great it was full of emotion......5/5 for sure!