HMmmmm its hard to criticize a good poem
i think here you can delete the lin and replace it showing your pain, not just death describe it, itll make it better well to me. show the pain

I turn my head
And realize im dead.

Im a little confused on the transition you use from the good and bad. nice poem 5/5

Interesting....I think you did a nice job on this. The only suggestion, get rid of some of the periods at the end of the lines...it slows down the flow a bit....I'm of the opinion except for a well placed comma or two this poem is fine with no punctuation. You do a good job of expressing your feelings and I like the uplifiting feel to the whole piece. All the best, Debbie