Ohhh this was so sad, yet so beautifully written, and it's such a shame some people do have to go through this.
The imagery was beautifully used, created very vivid pictures and the emotion shines through the words.
Flow as always, is flawless.
beautifully done.

Wow...this piece is jsut marvelous! You have major talent, as many pople have told you, im sure. The rhyming was flawless and come to think of it, SO WAS EVERYTHING ELSE! Well done!!! 5/5
Xx Chrissie

Gem
Great job on this poem.

She stands by the door waiting for him
He'll be home and checking the whole house soon
She leads such a trapped and unhappy life
Despite the perfection in every room

This is so sad. You have captured this with so much emotion. It is sad yet there are people stuck in this kind of life.
Excellent!
Take Care Love Cindy

Gem,

Wow. That was heartbreakingly sad. What's worse, is that people really do go through this - people do live in this type of trapped life that you described. The flow was flawless, the emotions were clear & strong, & your word usage was great.

"She stands by the door waiting for him
He'll be home and checking the whole house soon
She leads such a trapped and unhappy life
Despite the perfection in every room"

^ My favorite stanza. :] Fantastic job as always, keep writing! 5.5

- Stephanie Lynn .+.

Gem,

Wow, That was beautiful. The rhythmn of the words just fell off the tongue. Somehow, though, I knew this wonderful poem would end the way you did it.

Very well done.

Always,
Jeannie

Ignore the biter comment of Quip sweetie, someone who doesn't have any poems of their own has no right to tear you apart and try to squash your talent.
You did your best on this despire the personal problems you were going through and i think it's amazing. Don't let the b**tards get you down =)
I love you
Marcus xx

Not what I thought you'd do with this title at all, and I loved this so much more! This was awesome! I mean...totally sad, but awesome! If you've ever seen, Sleeping With the Enemy, then this poem fits it to a T. Good job! 5/5
Charisma*

Well done Gem! It's a very interesting poem. It's different and that's what I like bout it.

Gemma..what can I possibley say that someone already hasn't??? I mean...what an AMAZING job you did with this contest!! I want to add this poem to my faves because its so creative but sadly true...why men are that way, beats me!! I think its horrible they expect stuff to be nice and tidey forgetting us woman have lives and jobs of our own...this was amazing and I have no clue what more I can say!!
Chelsey

OMG that poem was an image, or a portrayal of perfection. It was just... so suspenseful, wondering why she was cleaning the house, then it just hits you at the end and leaves you hanging, and it's just... wow. I know you should win this contest. It doesn't seem forced at all, the rhythm may be off a little bit but somehow, the words you use do not seem to annoyingly disturb the flow.

This poem is just incredible.
Great job m'dear.
5/5
~Stephen White
(good luck! Hope you win!)

Oh, this was so sad. Sometimes continue their normal routine just to cherish memories and keep things alive as best as possible. You really described deep emotions in this piece.

Well done as ususal.

You have captured a woman's unhappy domestic and martial life so wisely and perfectly.Really impressive poem .

Hey dear congrats just saw you touched 300 mark with this poem , >>>:D<<<

This poem is like one big oxymoron and i like it. it is so sad that some peoples life are like this and i always hope that these sorts of poems influence one person to help themselves by getting help, and if any do, i'm sure this is one of them.

You never cease to amaze me your writing just gets better and better I love it. I loved this part she leads such a trapped and unhappy life
despite the perfection in every room
5/5

I like this peom. It's a shame many people do live like this. They work themselves to the bone to care for their abusive spouses and they can never seem to escape. People love to hurt those who are better than them.

Wow this poem is so moving and beautiful, yet so realistic. The last stanza really grabs you, and that last line! "Despite the perfection in every room," it makes you think...You're toatally on my favorites list- keep writing!

I liked the ending, but I think you could include more details about the feelings and emotions of the character throughout the poem. This way the poem not only describes how perfect was the house, but also how messed up was her life. You could make a contrast between the house and her life in every line, and that would make this an even better poem.

Keep writing. I can tell you're a great poet. =)

I liked the ending, but I think you could include more details about the feelings and emotions of the character throughout the poem. This way the poem not only describes how perfect was the house, but also how messed up was her life. You could make a contrast between the house and her life in every line, and that would make this an even better poem.

Keep writing. I can tell you're a great poet. =)

What a sickening husband she has married! Urrrgh
>_<

And despite the perfection in every room, how can he be so blind as to not to see how broken and imperfect their married life can be! How ironic...

I better stop ranting now. -coughs- It was truly my pleasure to read this poem by one of my favorite poets. Keep them coming and I surely will keep on reading. Love, Debbie Cakes

p.s. Yaarr, Idk. This writers roadblock is irritating, although I'm still in the process of writing something new. Thank you for the comment, my dear!

That was amaxing, enjoyed it
very much!