I really enjoyed this, its very good. Your talent has grown so much.

Loved the poem its really good and i loved it

Sad at the beginning and happy at the end... excellent job.5/5

Very nice poem, well written and good portrayal of feelings. Nice word use as well, a good read :)

5/5 well done :)

Dave.

Im completely shocked you are only 14...you are on your way to becoming a very talented writer. I really liked this poem for I think everyone gets lost along the way of life. I could definitely feel the emotion of being lost in this poem and I loved the description of how you became alive once again. Definitely loved the end..Keep up the great writing

Splendidly done, expecially for a 14 year old, you write well beyond your years. The emotion was strong, really powerful. the word choice was excellent, I lost myself, and it spoke volumes to my soul. Perfectly peened, great job 5/5 you deserve it and keep up the great work.

Interesting poem..i enjoyed it. it flowed good and there was some emotion in it..

my favorite part is

"For I am like a ghost,
Who sees but is never seen."

^^i just loved those lines.

5/5 =]

I say,"W-O-W"!

This poem is much better than the last.

You rarely see these types of poems; The ones that actually have happy endings.

I enjoyed reading this... Although at first it seemed like you tried forcing your vocabulary, you seemed to have broken out of that pretty early on and just resorted to writing from your heart.

I liked the idea, although I don't understand... is this poem about the apocolypse?
Seemed like it.

Again, I beg of you to write with punctuation.
It, at least to me, makes the poem so much clearer and interesting and easy-to follow.

Also, be a little more... deliberate when you speak about pain and prevalation(sp?), because here it seems to be just touching the iceburg, kind of avoiding something... I don't know why it feels like that, but maybe I'm just insane but it feels like something is missing.

Also, the change from bad to good seems pretty abrupt. I would extend the description for that part a little more so it seems to flow smoothly.

Still, wonderful job and beautiful word use =]

5/5
~Stephen White

Very interesting poem. It is unique, imagery is great atn atmosphere is superb. You wrote this piece excellently.

Wow, I like it a lot, truly excellently written dark poem, with amazing atmosphere. My favorite stanza is:
-My future is untold
My faith has diminished
For my hope to live in humanity
Has been lost with my mind-
The topic is interesting, and the flow of the whole piece is very good.

This isnt your best, but i still thought it flowed well, had good emotion, was dark and fitted to the category well.
love Tara-Kay
x

This piece had some good emotion and flowed easily it seemed to come from the heart although a little more punctuation would have been good.

Xlnt didn't understand alot but weldone

This was almost pouring with statements but no background to for the reader to understand the three major questions all poets must answer. Who , why, and why should I even care if you havn't answered one or any of the questions then tell me why are you even writing Plot121

Ahhh sad!!! but this one is really good. I think ur real talent though is in the rhyming poems, but this one was good as well!! :o]

"For I am like a ghost
Who sees but is never seen"

^^ My favourite part of this piece.
I found those two lines to hold so much power and meaning, they really stood out to me.

I enjoyed this, despite most of the piece not rhyming, I found it to have very good flow, and the ending was beautifully created, such passion and hope, while the writing itself was filled with such beauty and elegance.

"For I am like a ghost
Who sees but is never seen"

I loved that line that got me. i have to say i like ur style of writing your poems are structured great.

Keep up the good work.

Gary

I thought the title of this poem was very eye catching it almost makes the reader stop and check it out. The imagery in this piece was very good and I could see it play out in my head like a movie. Excellent job once again 5/5 GG23

Really nice wording in this poem, exellent imagary given off. xxx alex xxx