Comments : Pushed

  • 16 years ago

    by Startle Me

    Eck.
    You should really do some spacing.
    It's just...
    Weird and VERY overwhelming.
    The first thing that came into my mind when I saw this was
    OH BOY!
    Not in a good way, dearest.
    :[

    Eck.
    I wish I could write as well as you.
    This was uh-maze-zing.
    Also, I kind of found it funny when you said something about the spit.
    It felt so realistic.
    Lol.
    5/5 dearest :]

  • 16 years ago

    by Brittini

    I thought it was good but you really need spacing other then that i thought it was really great! really got caughting into the emotions liked it alot 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Zeus

    Wow. This is good poem. Very vivid and exciting. I felt the anger and hatred towards a bully. I've had many past experiences and i can truly relate. 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by shatteredsoul

    Oh, those darn bullies!
    I liked the detailed violence, but the again, who doesent?
    fighting is natural so why is it so....amusing?
    lol good work.

  • 16 years ago

    by CHOKE

    Wow, lovely poem. the anger and the hatred just felt so real. i loved the ending, there's nothing i would change about it. keep up the great work. 5/5.

  • 16 years ago

    by Tricky Daze

    It was so sad and sorrowful but my only suggestion would parting them to stanzas..other than that it was pretty touching
    Take care,
    Laura

  • 16 years ago

    by Beautifully Nothing

    Wow, very good poem. like they said though, do a little spacing and it will be perfect. amazing poem though, keep up the good work.

    Sincerely,

    Beautifull Nothing

  • 16 years ago

    by Fsams

    Beautiful poem with great rhymes and the dark component. LOved the way it flows and superb work.

    tc
    Fsams

  • 16 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    Honestly, some parts of this poem completely threw me off. I mean, in some lines you have great descriptions and truly dark atmosphere, and then you make some unoriginal, obvious rhyme which completely ruins whole effect.

  • 16 years ago

    by xxSuicidalxx

    Good poem...like it....you just need...erm...spacing maybe...very desriptive however, good work!

  • 16 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    Okay..how I love this.

    Your descriptions are excellent in this piece, and the imagery was beautifully detailed, it was like I could see everything that was happening.

    I loved the many conflicting emotions you put into this, it makes the poem very powerful., and I adore the ending...so stunning and it holds so much power.

    Amazing work on this.

  • 16 years ago

    by Not

    I LOVE THIS POEM , MAYBE BECAUSE OF ALL THE ANGER AND RAGE IN IT, I THINK THAT PUT THE EMOTION INTO YOUR WRITE WHICH MADE IT SO GREAT...!!!...5/5