Missing

by 4EvErMaKeBeLiEvE   May 29, 2007


Where have you been these past ten years
I have been so afraid
I don't know you and you don't know me
My memories of you are vague and empty
If I met you I wouldn't even know
You left me so long ago
Not even so much as goodbye
I hate to say it, but daddy hopes you die
I ask to vist, he says no with out a doubt
Last time I asked, I was almost kicked out
I wonder why you weren't there
Because of you the tears I cry
Are non-refundable

I want to say thanks to David Wallace for lending me his skills even if we started off rough:)

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Latest Comments

  • 9 years ago

    by Nate the philosopher

    Wow I loved it
    Very emotional and very sad
    5/5

  • 9 years ago

    by Aaron Martin

    Idk what to say.... thats brilliant

  • 9 years ago

    by David Wallace

    Thats better but still make the corrections. you mispelled visit and i dont think thats what u meant to say that on line 8. if u did meant to say that i apologize. thanks 4 the mention.

  • 9 years ago

    by David Wallace

    U made a error right where u wrote daddy hopes u die. read that sentence again and youll see what im sayin. its visit and not vist u missed an I towards the end of the poem ma. poems suppose to make a statement if u read my stuff it always end strong. the ending of ya poem is suppose to make people think and say wow. Try something like "I wonder why u wasnt there" or " Now because of you these tears are non- refundable" something like that to leave the reader thinking about u. this poem is fare ill give it a three.

  • 9 years ago

    by Josh

    I like the way you convey the emotions, it's almost liek I can hear you talking

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