Comments : My innocence

  • 16 years ago

    by Jubb Jubb

    Great poem i love it!

  • 16 years ago

    by katy

    I really liked reading this peom its so meaningful and it shows so many emotions :) liked it x

  • 16 years ago

    by WordsHurt

    Lovely poem
    It is meaningful
    Very Emotional.
    Only make it a bit longer.
    But its good like this too!
    Very nice

    Keep Smiling x

  • 16 years ago

    by x Mo x

    Whoa...That was very full of emotions. Your words were used so well. I loved it! Great write!

  • 16 years ago

    by ABake

    Great Job!
    One suggestion, try and put your words into stanzas.
    If you want anymore commented just let me know!
    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by sweetiepie18

    Wonderfully written, a joy to comment.

  • 16 years ago

    by Lethmelodis

    Very nice. Overall, meaningful and flows well, couple of grammar mistake though. Very good : )

  • 16 years ago

    by Lethmelodis

    Very nice. Overall, meaningful and flows well, couple of grammar mistake though. Very good : )

  • 16 years ago

    by bleeding limegrenn

    Great poem it flows well

  • 16 years ago

    by bacha

    I loved it very much:):):)

    great job girl for sure:):):)

    khuloodan:)
    smile all the time:)

  • 16 years ago

    by Perfectly Imperfect vaney

    Wow deep...loved it! keep up the work!! :)

  • 16 years ago

    by all because of him

    Great poem...u've got some real talent so dont let anybody tell u any different

  • 16 years ago

    by .K.i.T.t.Y.

    In general this is a great poem, but i found several errors.

    "I'm stuck in a place,
    a hell I call home.

    Where demons brake my innocence and taunt my soul,
    I can never [BREAK] free from this eternal pain.

    All I feel is shame and rejection, but most of all I'm filled with sorrow.

    With scarlet [SCARS] upon my wrist, I now know nothing is what it seems.
    I have nothing...I am nothing,

    Exaggerating the barrier between who I am and who they want me to be...my soul fades. "

    THERE WERE PLACES WHERE FLOW WASN'T COMPLETELY THERE. SOME STANZAS COULD'VE BEEN BROUGHT TOGETHER, AND SOME COULD'VE BEEN ADDED TO.

    I'll read one more of yours.

    =]

    please, if you have time, read a couple of mine?

  • 16 years ago

    by Sarah

    Nice poeem..Goood job! Keep iiit upp!

  • 16 years ago

    by Sarah

    Nice poeem..Goood job! Keep iiit upp! 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by DeadGirl AKA Becka

    Wow this is a very well written poem, it caught me in a net that made me not want to stop reading. it had alot of feeling in it, and i can tell many others like it as well. ^^
    Luvs,
    DeadGirl

  • 16 years ago

    by CHOKE

    Amazing poem! i couldn't pick out a favourite part because i loved every bit of it. you're doing great so keep up the good work. 5/5.

  • 16 years ago

    by DepthofPassion

    I think that this poem has potential.However, there are spots in which it didnt completely flow.
    Where demons break my innocence and taunt my soul....I thought this was a splendid line...and probably my favorite from the poem. Overall it wasnt bad...just the flowing issue..otherwise keep up the good work.

    Brit

  • 16 years ago

    by What A Beautiful Lie

    I absolutley love this poem! I can totally relate to it...keep up the good work.

  • 16 years ago

    by Sophia

    Its great, i felt the emotion, thats what make people great poetry writers, when they can make their readers feel the emotion of the poem. and i felt it.