Comments : Under The Guise Of Love (Collab)

  • 16 years ago

    by Corruption

    Lol great poem as i said on tempted's great job you two your though seems to have more detail in the lines like the ...'s and stuff lol

    keenan

  • 16 years ago

    by Cindy

    Debbie
    What a wonderfuly sad piece you two have written.

    Such tremendous confusion ripped them to shreds,
    Causing both hearts to crackle and break into pieces.
    From a terrible tragedy with millions of regrets,
    And a mutual bond they would no longer share,
    Both walked away with sorrow in their eyes...
    This stanza really tugged at my heart. So much emotion.
    Great job!
    Take care Cindy

  • 16 years ago

    by Tracy D Rollings

    Such tremendous confusion ripped them to shreds,
    Causing both hearts to crackle and break into pieces.
    From a terrible tragedy with millions of regrets,
    And a mutual bond they would no longer share,
    Both walked away with sorrow in their eyes...
    WOW that was and awesome poem, very deep and sad, but wonderfully written from the heart , wording was great and flow was outstanding, beautiful piece of poetry , a pleasure to read, great job my friend, your friend Tracy d 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by S0u10fS0rr0w

    I thought this to be a superb collab debbers, you and tempts did wonderful on this one, i give it a perfect 5/5, absolutely love the last stanza!!!

  • 16 years ago

    by Fsams

    Tossing away the ashes of youthful ferveur,
    Shuttering the shutters of willful ventures,
    With feeble efforts of passion pushed aside,
    Wherewith oddities and ambiguities coincide-
    I merely mistook the asking of your eyes...

    Beautiful and outstanding lexis used in its best way, your poem is musical, rhythemic and flawlessly flowing. Great collaboration indeed. This is really a poetically quality poem. tc

  • 16 years ago

    by Phil

    Wow what a wonderful piece of poetry, you have such a gift, what a talent, as I've always said to friends of mine, team work has no bounds, you and tempted should team up again, if there was such a score I would give you seven out of five, that's how wonderful this poem was, take care.
    Phil.

  • 16 years ago

    by Hebe

    Great poem.
    It's deep, emotional and sad.
    Wonderful written.
    Great collaboration indeed, well done.
    Take care

  • 16 years ago

    by Goran Rahim

    Oh dear, again you have touched me with another great poem of yours. as always this was more than great dear, you both surly did a wonderful job

  • 16 years ago

    by BlueDreams

    Dear, what a poem you expressive here..... this was Beautiful emotion penned you portrait here, I love the way how you express them... well done!

    Sedated senses in mind mused on times gone by,
    When young wind whirled and sighed on ardent skies.
    Taking my breath away, your blithe essence drew nigh,
    With the joys of July of roses revealed on eyes.

  • 16 years ago

    by KeyxMashingxParody

    "How horrific my heart turned pallid and dreary,
    Akin to Beauty's rose withered and writhed by demise.
    And blustered by a river of dread and uncertainty,
    As poor Psyche wryly wrangled and bellowed in despise,
    "...You fool! You merely mistook the asking of his eyes!"
    Loved this stanza, and the entire poem was flawless. 5/5 sweety.

  • 16 years ago

    by Gasttlee

    Appreciate the comment and this poem really rocks! 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Brittany C

    It was a great poem. I loved the imagery. The flow was very nice and was constent through out the entire poem. I gave it a 5/5.

  • 16 years ago

    by CEE CEE

    Wow i loved how you guys wrote this poem it turned out great i loved it. it took u guys a long time to write it and it shows it great you guys have chosen the perfect words for a great poem~

  • 16 years ago

    by Molly Elizabeth

    This poem is truly beautiful, I loved the whole thing... It flowed amazingly... the word choice was just beautiful. It was touching, and heart breaking at the same time. I absolutley LOVED it!! Keep up the amazing work :-) I hope you enjoy some of my poems too... although I have to say your work is about a million times better! Take care <3 5/5!!

    Molly

  • 16 years ago

    by BeautifulxMess

    Oh my. Just powerful and wonderful use of words and just a breathtaking write. One of the best poems I've ever read certainly. Well done. I just can't even start to explain how well this poem has captured me. God Bless 5/5
    <3tay

  • 16 years ago

    by Karl Wild GG23

    Usually when poems like this have to many big words and rare vocabulary the poem loses interest and flow, but this poem maintains both throughout. The word choice is amazing and the flow and imagery as well, fantastic poem 5/5 GG23

  • 16 years ago

    by Loved In Hell

    Wow this poem is amazing honestly the way you portrayed everything every scene flashed as i read your emotion and feel got intense very good job 5/5 all the way

  • 16 years ago

    by Spirit

    I'm jelous
    (did i spell that right?)
    5/5
    great job

  • 16 years ago

    by debbylyn

    Nicely done collab....each stanza followed perfectly the one previous....I especially like these lines...

    ...Alas,

    How horrific my heart turned pallid and dreary,
    Akin to Beauty's rose withered and writhed by demise.
    And blustered by a river of dread and uncertainty,
    As poor Psyche wryly wrangled and bellowed in despise,
    "...You fool! You merely mistook the asking of his eyes!"

    All the best, Debbie 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Marc Ortiz

    O_O oh wow that was simply beautiful. I LOVE the words used in this wonderful poem, Flow was flawless, Great vocab.. A perfect poem..

    5/5! all the way!