Nothing Is Gonna Change

All I had in my heart
Has gently faded away
Its not gonna change
No matter what I do or say

People say if you want something bad enough
And strive for it, you shall succeed in receiving it
But I dont believe that
I tried hard but now I quit

I had been trying
But never did succeed
So I just gave up
I did try so many good deeds

I had strived for more than a year
I had good going off and on
But now know this
All the good is gone

Ive stopped trying
And nothing is really going through my head
Except that thought thats always there
The thought being dead

What is happening?
Is it only happening to me?
I used to be this passionate girl
But now I am unhappy

What am I to do?
I dont want to feel this pain
No matter how much I try
Nothings gonna change

I guess the faith
Is no longer inside
I wonder what made it leave
I wonder why I hide

I hide my emotions
For no one to see
Now everyone can have a glimpse
Of what is inside of me

At this moment
I feel
Like I wish
My life was not real

I used to trick myself
Into thinking my life was but a dream
But its now been taken over
And my life I need to redeem

My emotions have taken charge
Now theres nothing left to do
Only to hope I get past this
And later remember what I went through

I hope if and when I get past this
Somebody will be there
They will be in later life
And they shall truly care