Life for me's a waiting game.
Yesterday, today the same.
But wait for you I would forever.
Hoping that we'll be together,
In the end I cannot wait.
But only God can tell our fate.
I worked so hard to win your heart.
But you had mine right from the start.
To wait for you it feels so worth it.
You're beautiful, you are so perfect.
You opened my eyes, helped me to see.
How God's great love could set me free.
Some say that I'm wasting time.
But I know one day you'll be mine.
Many roadblocks we've been through.
But one day we will say "I do."
Until that day I sit here waiting.
My love for you is never changing.
A special love you gave to me.
I sit here waiting patiently.
For you to come back to my arms.
I'll keep you safe and free of harm.
You must be sent from up above.
You showed me how it feels to love.
Until the day we're gray and old.
My heart is yours to have and hold.
You make me feel so good inside.
I'd wait for you until I die.
Wow... I'm in love with this poem. Maybe its because I feel I can relate to it so much, or maybe its because you did such an awesome job at placing images in the readers' minds. The last stanza sets it off a bit, since the structure is semi-ridgid until then, but it doesnt NEED to be changed, its awesome how it is.
Like the poem. i think you could of used a little more spell check and punctuation. also i think you tried too hard to rhyme on this poem. it kind of disturbs the flow. why don't you read it out loud and change a few words that aren't necessary in this poem. over all i think this poem was very sweet. i could feel the love you have for her and the complex attitude of falling in love too soon and waiting for some one else to fall in love with you. anyway i think you could make this poem much better. also one more thing. why don't you break the poem into stanzas. this lets the reader pause and absorb each line. you should keep writing. you have talent.
Honesty hour: this is a horrible poem. It lacks any ounce of originality and seems just like over a million other poems out there with absolutly nothing to have it stand out. If you look at, I'd say 15 other poems about love, I can almost guarantee some of the lines in this poem will be in them. Extreme dissappointment, 1/5.
This was really good. The flow was good and the rhyming was interesting and clever. The only things I would look over if I were you is it's slightly repetitive, you could perhaps take out a few stanzas that are repeated, but it's not bad it just takes away from the poem slightly. And I would consider breaking it up into stanzas. Poems generally look alot better when broken up then when they're one big "clump"
But it was really cute and fun to read. I found it really sweet and from the heart, and I enjoyed it alot. Keep it up! 5/5