How come Western peace protesters never protest against wars between Third World nations?

It doesn't take intelligence to spot genius any more than it takes stupidity to spot idiocy.

Never pray for anything that's not on your list of three wishes for a genie.

It amazes me what people consider to be "civilized", considering the track record of civilization.

What was it that fish spent so much time staring at, that they evolved into something that doesn't blink? Snakes? Must've been quite a staring competition!

If a horse produces one horse-power, how big is the horse? Surely a big horse produces more horse power than a small horse? "Oh my car produces 250 horsepower, but they're tiny horses."

When you give a mother hen claws with which she can dig, she is not an eagle. She is more like a mole: shortsighted and blinking in the reality of daylight, forever clucking the same hen cluck, deceiving herself as to her objectives.

Kenneth Lay is dead: ex-employees may feel cheated he never went to jail, but at least they can be safe in the knowledge he's getting screwed just as hard by Satan as Lay screwed them!

The meek shall inherit the earth. The greedy shall inherit the cool stuff. The stupid shall inherit the power. The rest of us won't notice a difference.

A friend rang to say her computer had the black death. Confused, I asked for details. She meant the "Blue Screen Of Death". I now find it hard not to imagine plague rats as being noticeable by their blueness.