Comments : Please.

  • 9 years ago

    by Naughtymouse

    OMG!

    I am sorry to start a comment on a sad piece like that but....this is such an unbelievable heart felt write....just ugh....I REALLY like how you have set this poem out because when written this way kinda like a net that just snares you in...no breaks between the stanzas to give you respite so to speak and because of the content of the poem that is very fitting because thats how life can feel sometimes.

    Your word choice, tempo of the poem is great as always and i do genuinly adore this write...although i am sorry for the insoriation for it.

    Sad but beautifully tragic.

  • 9 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    Same as mousey... OMG! that is what first springs to mind for me!

    I really love this piece from you, at first I wasn't sure of the layout, but by the end I was totally engrossed in the words!

    I admire the way you can tell a story fluently in your writing, without jumping all over the place like I do!

    I think you have worded this pain so much, and how much you have been hurt is clear here. I really relate to this, and also the indication that you are so closed off right now, that too far away to be reached, no matter who might try to reach you. I think this is sometimes pain, but also protection so you can't get hurt again.

    I like how you give us so much history of these two characters, that they seem to have been through a lot together, but yet are not together anymore, or at least the love is not the same as it was. Which is probably what hurts the most, when you still see/hear someone but it is not the same as it was before. Makes it harder to move on and stop longing for how it was.

    Rambling now! But truly love this write, one of my favourites from you!

    Sending hugs guinea pig!