Comments : Help

  • 9 years ago

    by Once an Angel

    Welcome to poems-and-quotes. From this poem and the other one you posted, it sounds like you are wrestling with some pretty powerful demons. Your struggle is admirable, and it is courageous that you are willing to struggle rather than give up. I encourage you to keep searching for words to express your feelings. Over the years I have found that writing and finding words is one of the best ways to bleed off some of the pain. Don't give up, okay?

  • 8 years ago

    by Dancing Rivers

    This poem has a slower pace than the first one, the rhythm makes me visualize a beaten down person, heD down, shoulders slumped, slight limp from weariness, walking down a dark alley, haunted by their misery. This is a very intense piece, you've gone very personal in this one mentioning parents, perhaps it's a strained relationship? Just in line 14, I think it should be " I don't know if you mean it" rather than " I don't know if you to mean it" other than that, I think this is an interesting piece with great potential, I can't wait to see what you'll come out with next