I found the flow to be very off in some places, ex: stanza two, you've got very long lines mixed in with a very short one. I also noticed that you rhymed everywhere except the first stanza, unless "saw" and "for" are supposed to rhyme. Other than that though, I think you did a prtty good job. :)

I liked the message behind this. really emotional and makes the reader think. i thought that in one or two places the flow was kinda shaky but other than that this was beautifully written.

Nice job, again the only ritisism I can give is to work on the flow a bit, but I thought the subject and your sentiment was great. I really enjoyed reading, nice work.