To Starve and Purge

by Chellee   Oct 12, 2011


I'm beginning to loose sight of things
Of myself, and what I want to do
It sort of feels like death, but in a less painful form physically
No, it's mentally draining though.
Exhausting and tiring.
The nights I lay awake just thinking about it.
Just trying to fall into the black of my eyelids.
But I can't,
It's like now, where I want to sleep but I can't
All I want to do is make everything leave my body
in one forceful blow.
But I can't because it'd hurt so many people!
It'd hurt me.
They'd all worry, just like before.
Except this time I'm more afraid of the future, if I take these actions
But I want to..
And these are the things I lay awake in my bed thinking.
Not boys, or love, these thoughts that encase my soul.
Will I be strong enough to pull away tomorrow.
Will I be strong enough to save myself?
I'm beginning to loose sight of things
and my life is becoming a hazy memory in the distance
I'm beginning to loose myself
to Ana & Mia

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