3AM thoughts.

Every human is searching for commodity,
Seeking love, friendship, longing for a hope.

Nevertheless when your 3AM thoughts arise from the dark shadows,
We crave a friend, a hug from a lover - withdrawing our pain from our hearts and minds.

Craving that luminous feeling in life, wanting to feel needed by someone,
Only to be obscured again when we are lost, left alone, betrayed by our absent phony friends.

A black mind is a dangerous and unhealthy matter, and when the clock hits 4AM,
Some suspicion continues to linger in the minds and hearts of the people.

Will I ever feel okay? Why do I expect so much when nothing ever happens?
God said that greed is a deadly sin, and sins must be punished.

And when I sit here 5AM with bleeding wrists and bloodshot eyes,
- I have been punished and purified.

Bleeding out of the dark spirits that have home in my Soul,
Making room for the love I crave so much.

Constantly reminded of my past, killing me with every breath I take,
When I again comprehend I am all alone, and you are so far away.

Are you listening my friend?
Can you hear my heart calling out for you?

I don't want to die alone, but greed is a sin,
And sins must be punished.

Therefore I lay here, never once thought it would be permanent,
This constant demand of feeling loved, when I purify myself every night.

A craving that will never be satisfied,
As long as the world are full of fake individuals who never have had 3AM thoughts.

Individuals, who have never felt how it's like drowning,
When everyone around you is breathing perfectly fine.

I am invisible, vanishing into my own mind, eating me from the inside out,
My friends don't care and oh God, neither do I.

My time is ticking, and I don't want to feel a thing anymore,
It's a brutal world, when you stand alone.