Suicidal Sacrifice

I rewind back to eleven years ago today.

My mind was racing
as I sat upon my bed,
etching your name into my skin
with the sharpest blade I could find.

The night had been so unkind,
and I knew it would take my whole life
to figure out how to go on surviving
when you're gone.

It's like you knew
there would be no happy ending.
You tried to scream for help so many times,
but no one ever came.
So you finally decided to fly with the angels
and say goodbye to all of your pain.

I scratched your name a thousand times
until my blood began to drip;
I was so scared of forgetting your memory
that I wanted to carry you with me forever.

And although eleven years ago today,
my heart began to hate you,
I no longer blame you
for leaving this world,
or for leaving me.

I'm glad you found a place free from pain,
and if that meant letting go of me,
then that sacrifice was just how things
were meant to be.

Saffie
24

25/8/15