A Betraying Friend. [Collab]

by Crystal Gaze   Sep 3, 2007


A Betraying Friend.
By: Broken Wing's and
Crystal Gaze.

A loneliness sinks in,
Tears well in my eyes,
As I watch her move closer too you,
And bat her pretty eyes.

Does she not think I see it?
Does she think I'm blind?
Does she think it doesn't hurt me,
When she tries to catch your eye.

Shes involved with someone else,
But she craves for you to,
How could someone be so unfaithful,
To want not only him but also you.

I wonder if she knows,
I would die if you were to go,
Is she trying to hurt me,
By getting to were I need to be.

Your only but a dream now,
Almost from my reach,
I need to feel your warmth,
Or I'm going to screech.

Would you really leave me,
For someone who's not as kind,
I know you have a heart,
So please don't be so blind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
M: This is our second collab together, and like the last it was quite fun. I'm glad you could help me with this piece.
I think it turned out pretty good.
I luv ya sis. xoxox. Comment's and Vote's are much appreciated.
Thanks.
-- Elly.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Blissful

    Now this is something I could really relate too. The emotions you spoke of are ones I am familar with. The flow was kinda rocky and things seemed forced but the feelings were real. *4/5*

  • 16 years ago

    by Tammie

    I can definately relate to this, as many people would be able to. It was such a simple poem, yet filled with a lot of emotion. A very enjoyable read. I've never done a collab before, but I bet it's fun. Well done. :]
    5/5

    Tammie

  • 16 years ago

    by Alexandra Jade Brewer

    That was phenomenal the emotion was sooo strong! again keep up the great work

  • 16 years ago

    by Tricky Daze

    You two did a really good job together
    I had read the first one too and liked it too
    My fave lines are;

    Your only but a dream now,
    Almost from my reach,
    I need to feel your warmth,
    Or I'm going to screech.

    Keep it up hun,
    Laura

  • 16 years ago

    by Cella Bella

    A sad piece written beautifully. The rhyme and flow were flawless throughout the entire poem. 5/5
    marcella