A Cloud OF Tortured Dreams.

by Crystal Gaze   Dec 13, 2007


A Cloud OF Tortured Dreams.
By Elaine.C.

Her body shook uncontrollably as her hands gripped the blanket tight around her form.
Her eyes were squeezed shut, yet tears still managed to roll down her pale cheeks.
The fear had taken over her body swiftly, and the pain followed short after, she was
consumed in yet another tortured dream...

He stood before her guilt clear in his eyes as he did not answer her frantic pleas.
His silence said everything, she felt naked to the claws ripping at her heart..
pliant to the pain and emptiness that was consuming her.
She could hear "It" berating herself for her fools hope.

"How could you ever think you could compare to her!, she's beautiful, A rose any man would
kill to posses. You think your pitiful self could compare, to such perfection? Your A fool!
It was bound to happen, your Romeo fall in love with another. There was no way you could stop
it.Your tears could not stay his words,your pleas not change his judgment. He was tempted
by temptation herself.Think about it, your a deformed hag compared to her, your nothing!..."

Pain white hot and fresh burst through her, all air rushed from her lungs,color's mixed and
her vision blurred as she fell painfully in a heap to her knees, her long hair a curtain for
her eyes.

when she blinked away the tears, and the rainbow of color's, a shaking hand reached up and
flicked the hair back from her face.Her heart bloody and torn, fell in shattered pieces, to
the floor, as she beheld the site in front of her.

Excruciating pain raged through her, killing everything in it's path, as welling eyes took in
her love sitting with temptation upon his lap. His arms were wrapped around her lovingly..
Just like they were once wrapped around her..

Her lips moved but no words could come out. All she could do was watch with teary eyes, as
her strength was slowly vanishing..

Suddenly she stood, looked deep into his eyes- the eyes she once saw love in- but now, now
she saw nothing.. They were empty of all feelings for her.
she turned and bumped into someone, but her voice was lost she couldn't utter a simple "Sorry"
before she began to run.

Her hair whipped behind her, as the air rushed in her face. She could hear nothing, could feel
nothing..Her hands reached forward as the metal doors loomed before her, without stopping she
burst through the doors, tears now falling unchecked down the burned skin of her cheeks.
She ran until she came to the middle of the parking lot, there she let out a heart wrenching
scream, a last pitiful weep of the love she had just lost, before pulling a knife and stabbing
it deep within her heart...

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Blissful

    Wow the emotions you expressed here were so deep and captivating. I just adored the story you told me because it was filled with meaning and power. Nice choice of words to describe the events. Well done *5/5*

  • 15 years ago

    by Mister 47

    Well yeah it look more a story then a poem , but i like the chain of event and expressions

  • 16 years ago

    by Anthony Duvalle

    Wow amazing ending

    it really all told an amazing story of pain and anger

    just amazing

  • 16 years ago

    by dollwithafrown

    The structure here seemed to be off, and for this poem, I don't think it worked as well in comparison to your other one. However, I did really like the strong emotion created in this piece.

    "He stood before her guilt clear in his eyes as he did not answer her frantic pleas."
    ^^ I think you should put a comma in after 'her' and 'eyes'. It would help with the flow. :]

  • 16 years ago

    by Kaila

    Again I don't see a structure here really at all. I think it would be nice if you added short story because most people think it's a poem and in my opinion it doesn't have the structure to fit the poem criteria.