I need advice...

So heres the story...

my 21st birthday was on the 6th and i threw a hotel party and i had a bunch of ppl come celabrate with me and after drinkin a lil to much my cuzin thought it would b funny 2 put a cube of ice in my pants...well stupidly i pulled down my pants and was prettty much walkin around the hotel room tryin 2 get it out and my best friend Jasmine* thought i was stripping and being stupid but really i wasnt so she got in my face and was yellin at me on the top of her lungs cursing me out and sayin i was makin a fool outta myself (my best friend had NOTHING 2 drink or anything she was completely sober) well i was tryin 2 explain myself but she wouldnt listen so i started yelling tryin 2 tell her wat happened and she got in my face even more and i pushed her away and she came at me and sucker punched me in the eye. (i indeed DO have a purple eye and i have a blood spot in my eye)i flew on the floor and she CONTINUED 2 yell and curse me out so my other best friend Nadine* got in her face and was screamin at her sayin she shoulda never did that and Jasmine had the nerve 2 threatin Nadine. Jasmine ended up just leaving and ppl told her what really happened and she felt like shit and came back 2 the room 2 apologize like a hour later and i was even more intoxicated so i forgave her...well wen i woke up in the morning i thought i was the biggest idiot 4 forgiving her cuz no matter HOW WASTED i was she should NEVER lay a finger on me! i texted her and told her i plan 2 not talk 2 her 4 a long time and 2 not contact me 4 a long time and that i couldnt put into words how much i hated her and she didnt respond...i just wanna know if im OVER reacting? i think what she did was TOTALLY unexceptable and messed up and im FURIOUS with her but idk whats the right thing 2 do...helpp

To be honest, and maybe it's just me, but I think you are way over reacting! First of all, your friend was completely sober as you said, you were intoxicated. Are you sure you remember what really happened? Just curious..

Anyways, your friend was trying to protect you. She probably didn't want to see you intoxicated in the first place, and stayed sober to make sure you didn't do anything stupid. (I'm just trying to pan things out from her perspective) When you did do something stupid, she snapped because well, alcohol shows a very ugly side in people.

Sorry to laugh, but sucker punching a drunk person sounds like an oxymoron. They would never expect it coming, even if you told them..

Yes, she was wrong for punching you, but like any good friend would do, she came back to apologize.

I think you NEED to talk to her. Find out why she got so angry at you. Maybe there's a reasonable explanation. You could never really know what a person is thinking, so find out from the source. Call her/text her, request a time to chat, and sort things out. DO NOT get mad at her, try to understand where she's coming from.

Hopefully what I wrote made sense, if not, well, I can always try again! Lol

She was completely sober and i wasnt so shouldnt that b the reason 4 her 2 just walk away? and yes i remember wat happened and i asked other ppl wat happened 2 make sure...u can protect someone but punching them is not a great way 2 go! no she didnt stay sober 4 me she doesnt drink 4 religious reasons...she came back 2 apologize cuz she heard how hard she hit me and how my eye was huge and purple with a blood spot on my actual eye ball.

i would NEVER let a man touch me so y is it ok 4 me 2 let a FRIEND hit me?? this wasnt the first time she hiit me...about a year ago she slapped me across the face and i told her she was never allowed 2 touch me again and she said she was sorry and she wouldnt but yaaa think again...

if she woulda yelled and screamed and left i woulda understood but i just feel like abuse is NEVER the answer.

im not attacking u in any way i hope its not comin out like that im just still debating on everythingg..thanks 4 the advice...

It sounds like a complicated situation now. I didn't know she had hit you before. There could be a reason why she's like that. Any ideas?

Some people can't control their frustration sometimes, and violence is the only out source. Doesn't give her a reason to hit you at all, just trying to figure out why she would.

If you can do without her as a friend, then it's pretty obvious you drop her as a friend.

That's the advice I would give if I were in your shoes. I was sort of looking at the whole thing from an outsider perspective.

Idk it'd b hard 2 just drop her just cuz we have been friends for 8 years and shes been the hard rock i always relied on 2 get me back up on my feet...but im debating if my good heart is getting in the way of wat i SHOULD do...i love her so much but she makes me really mad with her actions torwards me..its hard 2 explain....

thanks 4 the advice tho =]

You have the nerve to be mad at her and say that "she should [have] NEVER [laid] a finger on me"? You were the one who pushed her first. I don't care if she's slapped you before in the past or not (because I don't know that she has), you should have been the better person; the better friend, and should have walked away instead of putting your hands on her. If she has slapped you in the past before you should have known not to instigate her. This is a fine example of hypocrisy.

It sounds like all she was was being a good friend by trying to look out for you, even if that meant she had to "get into your face". She should have calmed down and just listened to what you had to say instead of presuming that you were going to do something or that you were drunk at that time, and she shouldn't have "threatened" your other friend. But I know when it comes to my friends that I would protect them from anything and anyone any way I could, even if it was from themselves, and even if that meant I had to get in theirs or anyone else's face about it.

At least she was the bigger person in this situation coming back to apologize to you and admit to her mistake. If anything, YOU owe her an apology, as well.

You say that she's your friend, you have been for 8 years, but that you "hate" her? That doesn't sound like something a "friend" would say.

As far as I see it, you're in no way a better "friend" than she is and you're both to blame.

[editing, computer acting up]

Ok it sounds 2 me like ur mad lmaooo calm down there honey...

i was so angry with her that i said i hated her and i dont hate her wats so ever and she KNOWS i said that outta anger...

looking out 4 someone doesnt mean u HURT them...THATS RETARDED! and i pushed her cuz she wasnt listening 2 my explaination 2 y i was doin wat i was doin...no i dont think i shoulda pushed her but i was beyond intoxicated and she was sober and if i was in her shoes i woulda just walked away not socked her in the face!

she did come back 2 apologize which i give her credit 4 but i needed 2 b away from her cuz how hurt i was about the situation...

she texted me yesterday apologizing and explained herself and we r finally ok again and i missed her very much...

Glad to here things worked out. It's stupid, for you and your friend, to put 8yrs of friendship on the line over something that didn't have to be taken to such extremes.

And as for this comment: "Ok it sounds 2 me like ur mad lmaooo calm down there honey..." No, I wasn't, and am not, mad. I have no reason to be. I'm just telling it like it is from a sober, outside source you asked for. I wasn't the one who was '!'s' my sentences or capitalizing my words. I'm as chill as a cucumber... I don't know where I got that from, lol.

Also,

"if i was in her shoes i woulda just walked away"

^ You could have just walked away too, drunk or not, on both feet or all fours. Whatever it took.

"and i pushed her cuz she wasnt listening 2 my explaination"

^ That's hypocritical, again. Shoving someone just because they weren't listening to you is, as you said, "retarded". Shoving her for not listening to you, or because she hit you doesn't make you or what you did any more justifiable.

You said, out of anger, you shoved her and, out of anger, you said you "hated" her. Likewise, out of anger, she hit you. From what you're saying, it's acceptable and understandable that you did and said those things out of anger because you felt sorry about it and didn't mean it, but it's unacceptable and superficial that she had as well? That doesn't sound fair, that sounds like a one-sided friendship in which case one friend benefits more than or from the other.

Like I said, as an outside source, you were both to blame. You can't just shrug all the blame onto her shoulders. Yes, she should have been patient with you, shouldn't have hit you and shouldn't have threatened your other friend, but you shouldn't have shoved her first or said you "hated" her. Both of you had a chance to walk away. But, anger got the best of both of you. You're two peas in a pod. You were made for each other.

Lol@Elizabeth

I think she asked for advice, not a lecture! But things are settled, so all is good.

^ Lol, true. But this is a discussion forum. Remember. And it's not like you didn't "lecture" her either. Besides, I think she could have used both, or at least hope she had learned something from both. That's the biggest benefit she could get out of this and her experience: Having learned something.

^^ Lol, I kept my cool though. :P

Personally, I don't really learn much from lectures. I'm better off learning things from experience, and taking advice from primary sources. Having someone talk about the topic like I need to be educated, makes me bored.

*Sigh* No wonder I don't like going to class...

Well, lets hope she did learn something from it. :)

Oki mommy and daddy i have learned from my life experience lmaooo ya that was kinda like a lecture but its all good i just took it as advice...

thanks 2 the both of u...

and yes i guess me and her ARE made 4 each otherhaha i think that was an insult but its all good =]