Did I do the right thing?

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for almost 2 years. Never broken up once. That being said the first two months we were dating I went on a cruise. My boat was the one that almost tipped over in Texas. Well i had met a guy there and well I kissed him. I was 14 then. A few months went by and I told my boyfriend what happened. Even after that he never yelled at me, but forgave me. My mom told me i should have never told him. But i did. I thought it was the right thing to do. I can tell that it still hurts him once in awhile and every time it comes up i start crying and it's hard to stop. Knowing I could have lost my best friend and he could have hated me. And now i'm think was me tell him the right thing or wrong?

You mentioned "I can tell it hurts him...every time it comes up." Do you know why this incident is still being discussed? Do you bring it up or does he?

Hiding what happened would have been a betrayal on your part, and the longer you left it, the more it would have played on your mind. So you did the right thing in being honest. Remember you were only 14.

I looked at your profile, and you speak fondly of your boyfriend. It would be unwise to dwell on, or feel unsure, about a decision you made. You had no idea what your boyfriend would say to it, and that's a brave thing to do at such a young age. If you regret telling him because you feel it's put a strain on the relationship, then that's something you'll both have to work at and talk about. NOT telling him, would not necessarily solve that. Would you have wanted him to tell you if the roles were reversed? Remember, you are two years older now, and have so much to be thankful for with your boyfriend. Don't doubt yourself. Be strong and brave and confident in who you are, who you love and what you've done.

^^^

I agree with everything said above.

You were young when you kissed him. Nobody at 14 can have a true serious relationship. Just to young to fully grasp the concept of it. I think you made the right decision in telling him. Otherwise it would have been weight on your shoulders & tore you apart inside.

Idk why he or you keep bringing it up. He forgave you for it years ago. Y'all need to leave it in the past; If hes the one bringing it up. Then he never fully forgave you for it bcuz he can't let it go.

You need to talk and tell him lets leave this is in the past. It was a mistake I regret, but you forgave me for it so why is it continuing to be brought up.

The incident is still being discussed because when he feels alone he thinks about it. I think that sometimes he's thinks he's not worth of me and thinks back to that time. But I try every day to show him I love him. Sometimes I bring it up because I feel bad and he brings it up when he thinks of it. I agree the past. Thank yall for yall advice. It made me feel a lot better in my chose to do that.

Your welcome girl.

But honestly, if yall have any hope in working out; the past needs to be in the past. If he keeps thinking about it, no matter how much you show you love him, He might think oh she did it once, why not again.

Its what happens to some guys when they've been hurt. I don't think you ever would but it needs to be left alone otherwise it will tear your relationship apart.

& What do you mean not worth of you?
Like you don't deserve him or vice versa?

Well I don't deserve him sometimes because he's to good to me. and i think because I did that he thinks he's not good enough for me. which is not true

Yeah but he needs to understand it happened years ago & yall were 14. Still way young then & can't really understand a true relationship then.

You guys need to be happy to have eachother in yalls life girl. If not it will tear it apart

If you both think that you're not good enough for each other, then your relationship will shrivel up into a sad, dead thing. It's like a beautiful rose telling a gardener that it doesn't deserve the rain, just cos it's got thorns. Makes no sense!

Accept the fact that no one else deserves you, and that you both deserve each other. If you don't feel passionate enough to believe that, truly, then maybe you don't know yourself properly just yet.

Well i talked to him. one last time, I asked if we can stop talking about it and never bring it up again. I told to talk about it all he wanted and when he was done we leave it in the past. he asked one question and that was the end of it. since then we have been better. much more lovey dovey and all that. Thank you guys for your help it helped alot and truely helped me understand that me telling him was right. :) Thank you.

Aw good, well done =]

Aw im glad yall figured it out (:

For future referance, any problem can be overcome in a relationship.

Than you Dead Soul. I'll keep that in mind for the future.

You did the right thing if he had found out that you kissed the guy from someone else it would have eneded badly. the most important thing in a relationship is trust and truth. if you cant be honest and truthful then you wont be able to trust eachother. Make sure that he knows you dont want/see any other guy besides him that should make him feel special. :)

I say you did the right thing.

When my husband use to be my boyfriend,
I told him evrytin i did good or bad, yes it hurts him n it hurts me bt i js want him to kno evrytin i dnt want him to feel i hide things. Ive alwys been like that with him,
In my opinion u did the right thing

Id say in time he could get over it.