Scars

I had a heart transplant in 2012. I also had two LVADs and chest tubes. I have several scars now. The one from the transplant is the biggest I have, but I feel like who would even want to be in a relationship with me now :( I don't mean to sound like I'm complaining. I just feel like no one will ever love me. Can anyone relate ?

Yes. I can but not from any transplant. I've had scars from self harm and no matter what anyone says people will judge you for it and it's sad. They look at you so differently. I can feel your pain sadly.

I started cutting when I was 16, but stopped around 18. I'm 23 now, but feel like I'm 40 if you know what I mean. I'm sorry to hear that you hurt yourself :( That makes me sad. Can I ask why you do it? Yes, but I don't think the judgmental people will ever change unfortunately.

It's amazing that you stopped and I am glad you have. Yes I know what you mean. I think if you've been through a lot you have had to grow up. When I did do it I did because it was my way to cope from all the crap I've been through. The first time I did it it was because mt besty died. That started it.

You may pm me if you wish to talk though :)

I have these huge scars on my feet due to surgery and scars from playing soccer all over my legs and scars from self harm. i know what its like to not want a relationship because of them. but you know what? The scars are who you are. and a true guy will love you. even your scars.

May I ask what surgery you had? I agree but it's hard to find a guy like that. It's hard to trust people anymore.

You will trust again in time. It is hard now but there is always someone out there

Scars are mere marks, when someone truly loves you, it wouldn't be something he would notice. Beauty comes from many places, not just physical appeal. You are someone who has such traits, you are sensitive is all and just need that person.

I think the emotional scars are worse because they will always be there. After 8 years I still have very bad thoughts and I know I still will after I get help

To me scars are something that show someone has had a past. A past that has gone away leaving them beautiful.

Sometimes I miss my scars.

Yes I can relate for I too have a big surgical scar on my hand which is the first thing anyone notices about me. I feel that after some time one learns to live it . Also what i feel is that when there would be a right person for you petty scars wont matter

^ I like what you said about finding the right person. And since you made a recent post I thought I'd share too.

Certain scars I have aren't really something I see to be "proud of" on one spectrum, but on the other I don't experience strong shame simply at the sight. Sure, there are times where there are insecurities or I feel like they define me, but overall I'd like to believe I'm pretty neutral abut them. To some, they may tell a story/journey or others may use the term "battle scars" but I don't know how much I buy into that. Yes, they're a part of us, caused from whatever, but personally I don't look more into them then what they are and what happened in the past. Each person may be different though based on what they're comfortable with or how confident, etc...

"if every scar tells a story then my body could write a book"

^ nice quote.
If somebody really likes you they will get past the scar issue.
(Them really do people do exist...ive met some of them)

I'm ashamed of my scars, can't stand them, I quit cutting almost a year ago almost, and haven't thought about self-harming yet and if I have I don't remember I have friends who will slap me silly