Father's day

In the UK we are celebrating Father's day.

I realise it's an opportunity for retailers to make lots of money, but it's more than that, isn't it?

Personally, my dad is no longer alive. He passed away when I was 15. For my own reasons I don't miss him as a person. When I see other father / adult son or daughter relationships I do wonder: what if?

I'm lucky enough to be a dad. I love the role and take the responsibility seriously. My son is so very special to me. Any time we spend together is precious and I know he feels the same.

Share your dad experiences here:

My Dad...well, he was and, always will be my hero :) I'm sure most of you will feel the same about your own dad. Not only did he teach me to ride a bike but...he built it too. In fact, he built many over the years. I was his test pilot..this meant he built...I tested and then they were sold on to some other little girl. Same with cars...we never actually owned one but there was always one for driving around in while it was being 'fixed'. I was an oil and grease kid I guess...but loved it!

My dad also was an avid reader and a lover of poetry...he could recite heaps of poems and I mean epic ones! Maybe some of it somehow rubbed off on me .

My dad, as a very young lad, was a soldier in WWII (thankfully a survivor) and, only last year I successfully applied, and gained, his war medals (something he personally wasn't interested in obtaining)...this year, on Ansac Day my grandchildren wore his medals and they were asked to release the doves of peace...it was a special moment that I'm sure my dad (my hero) was looking down on.....thank you for this thread Michael.

Sorry to hear about your relationship with your father Mr D, I don't know the details but I feel he is the one who missed out.
Hellon I loved your story of your time as a youngster with your Father. He sounded like a proper hero.

This made me think of my own relationship with my Dad. (something I have never thought about before) We talk, we play snooker sometimes but I am not sure how I feel. He left our family home when I was 5 years old. Leaving my mum with three children. He went to travel America for a year and I forgot about him. A few years later he came back into contact and we visited him every Saturday. This was okay. He does try but I sometimes struggle with his hyper critical nature. He will see the very worst in something and ignore the good. He married my mum when she was 16 and he was 17. (far too young) My Mum says he was quite mean as a young father and some of the things he had done to me would have the social services jumping up and down.
Anyhow

I have three children of my own (15,14 and 12) and I have taken into my care my niece and nephew (7 and 6). I am an absolute pushover as a father. Especially with the girls who walk all over me. I am their servant and my wife is always telling me that I need to get tough with them.
Happy fathers day to all those Dads and stand in Dads

My own dad was my hero until my teens when his alcoholism took control of his life. It has only been in the past 20 odd years that I have restored his original image. He had a knack for telling a yarn that definitely rubbed off on me. On the other hand, he was always so Formal! I am much more laid back than he ever was.
I loved traveling with him, driving all over the Southeast United States. I thought it was normal for kids to spend a month of summer in Florida.
I truly can say I have regrets, but would never want to erase even the bad memories of dad if it meant I'd have to lose the good ones.

My dad, as I said earlier, could recite epic poems...word for word (well almost) one I remember was Hiawatha...he always kind of clapped his palms together and I thought it was a way of remembering the words now....well I'm thinking, was it something to do with meter? I've said before that I'm not aware of meter when I write and maybe it's because the beat is in my head...I'm not sure to be honest...

He was also very musical...could pick up almost anything and squeeze a tune from it...I miss him terribly :(

My own father grew up on a farm in Shropshire in the 50s and is as practical as they come. Annoyingly, there is nothing he can't turn his hand to and master. He is genuinely one of the cleverest men I have ever met but is eccentric too, because of that perhaps.
In terms of personality, we are polar opposites. I wear my heart on my sleeve in all aspects of life: I'm quick to anger, quick to feel elation, the first to tell the kids how much I love them, cuddle, kiss - the whole nine yards. If I don't get it out, I explode. As far as my father (and brother) are concerned, squeezing any kind of emotion out of them is like squeezing blood from a stone. In honesty, that's hindered things a little down the years as I honestly believe he has very little understanding of who I actually am because I have always been unwilling (or felt incapable) of discussing these things with him - from my teenage years on. He only found out I wrote poetry recently because my wife told him. But I am lucky - he always had time for us and is a wonderful grandfather.
As far as I'm concerned, I make sure my kids feel free to talk to me about anything at all and they always know how much I love them, but the flip side to this is they always see my bad moments too. I think as long as we do our best as parents, no more can be asked. Unfortunately, that may not always be enough, as miserable as that sounds. We can only hope our kids realise one day that we are people too.

My dad is a born and raised smart-ass from the east coast (New York). He's not just a smart-ass, but he's the smartest person I know. He has his Masters in Forestry and a Ph.D. in Economics. He worked in construction until age 40. He has a black belt in Tai Kwan Do and Seido and he picked up Aikido a couple of years ago, which is incredible because he'll be 70 in September. In fact, aging has never stopped him. He bought his first motorcycle a little over a decade ago, started brewing beer 5 years ago, and just returned from a month long trip to New Zealand with my mom. He's a good, adventurous, and generous person. He's done it all and lived a full life (so far). He's Mr. Fix-it and Mr. Knows-it. I hold him in high regard and truly aspire to be like him. We have struggled with our relationship throughout the years (some people think because we're so similar), but recently we're making an effort to be friends, not just father and daughter. For Father's Day, I had a custom metal "art piece" made for him.

"I think as long as we do our best as parents, no more can be asked. Unfortunately, that may not always be enough, as miserable as that sounds. We can only hope our kids realise one day that we are people too."

Well said. I went through believing my parents were perfect to recognizing their flaws and believing it totally discredited them to coming full circle and realizing that they're wonderful people, flaws and all, and they did their best as parents. I think most children with decent parents go through these stages.

I always find this topic of conversation fascinating. Do we learn how to 'be' from our parents, or how NOT to be ... it can so easily go either way.

My dad was far from perfect but he was a real character and not easily forgotten. All of my worst traits seem to mirror his, but also some of his best traits too. He taught me to love fiercely and laugh passionately. Any thoughts of my dad are accompanied by the song "The Walk of Life" by Dire Straits ... I have an image of him 'dad dancing' to it that always makes me smile :-)

The best example of a father I know is my son's dad ... he's the full package. He loves unreservedly and has given our son a unique 'flavour' and view of the world that shouldn't have been possible given his own awful childhood. That, to me, is strength, resilience and sheer determination to not allow cycles to be repeated. I'm both proud of him and in awe at the same time.

Didn't realize what a hero he was until I lost him. If I ever succeed, then all credit goes to him. Love you forever, daddy.