how to make a woman happy

  • heather
    20 years ago



    For all you guys out there who just can't figure it out, here it is.
    In the world of romance, one single rule applies:
    Make the woman happy!
    Do something she likes and you get points.
    Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.
    You don't get any points for doing something she expects...
    Sorry, that's the way the game is played.

    Here is a guide to the point system:

    Simple Duties:

    You make the bed..+1
    You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows..0
    You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets..-1
    You leave the toilet seat up..-5
    You leave the toilet lid down..-10 after the lights are out..-30
    You replace the toilet-paper roll when it's empty..0
    When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex..-1
    When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom..-2
    You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light panty liners with wings..+5
    But return with beer ..-5
    You check out a suspicious noise at night ...0
    You check out a suspicious noise and it's nothing..0
    You check out a suspicious noise and it's something..+5
    You pummel it with a six iron..+10
    It's her father..-10

    Social Engagements:

    You stay by her side the entire party..0
    You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college drinking buddy..-2
    Named Tiffany..-4
    Tiffany is a dancer..-6
    Tiffany has implants..-8

    Her Birthday:

    You take her out to dinner..0
    You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar ......+1
    Okay, it is a sports bar..-2
    And it's all-you-can-eat night..-3
    It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team..-10

    A Night Out With The Boys:

    Go out with a pal ..-5
    And the pal is happily married ..-4
    Or frighteningly single ..-7
    And he drives a Mustang..-10

    Your Physique:

    You develop a noticeable potbelly..-15
    You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it....+10
    You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts ..-30
    You say "I don't care because you have one too"...-800

    The Big Question:

    She asks, "Do I look fat?" ..-5
    You hesitate in responding..-10
    You reply, "Where?"..-35

    Communication:

    When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression ..0
    When she wants to talk, you listen, for over 30 minutes..+5
    You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV..+10
    She realizes this is because you've fallen asleep..-20
    is this funny yes or no

  • heather
    20 years ago

    oh i know you are lol

  • heather
    20 years ago

    oh are you ok:{

  • heather
    20 years ago

    lol

  • heather
    19 years ago

    i kno lol

  • heather
    19 years ago

    lol

  • ~* Joyful *~
    19 years ago

    LOL nice one

  • Million Tears
    19 years ago

    nice nice!!!

  • Ş∂ņďħy∂
    19 years ago

    :) Lovely. You made me smile. :)

  • Lexi Lou
    19 years ago

    lol hilarous! all guys need that guide! specially during that time of month!(4 the girl i mean)
    lexi lou

  • heather
    19 years ago

    lol not all men r like this luv heather

  • creasy
    19 years ago

    yes.

  • Cloud
    19 years ago

    haha that was hilarious