Wow I don't know what to say.
This poem is sad and it made me feel sad just reading it, I mean I once again loved the phrases like:
-"strawberry taste of your wine cool lips"; and
-"because you and i are candles burning to be
lit."-I really liked this part!!!!!;
-"i dont ever want anything but a strawberry
kiss."-this part ended the poem very well, I
think it made me enjoy the poem more!
12 years ago
I love this poem, its one of your best and at the moment my favorite poem in all of everywhere <333. The flow was amazing and i really enjoyed reading it well done.5/5. i look forward to read more of you work in the future.
This is a simply beautiful and tragic write. The atmosphere you created with your word usage was strong and wonderful; each and every word seemed perfectly ensconced within the lines and emotions. The flow was nice and seemingly effortless.
The first two lines really intrigued me,
and the second line:
"so hold hands with my voice for now"
-Very clever, and one of my favorite parts.
"dont tell me it's not worth the effort again
because no ending is good without a fight."
-I loved these lines: they really expressed to me how much dedication and desire it takes to be in a relationship; how meaningful and important, though sometimes heartbreaking, the conversations we hold are. To stand up for one's heart, no matter the circumstances.
"it's not fair that every kiss now is compared
to the strawberry taste of your wine cool lips"
-Beautifully penned, and passionately felt: made me see and taste what you described.
This is a very good piece. Oozing raw and sincere emotion. I really enjoyed reading it. I'll go ahead and state the obvious, saying: I would ask you to capitalize the necessary words, but in the larger scope that didn't throw me off too much or take any punch out of the poem -- so I suppose it doesn't matter. Hum.