Comments : A thousand heads need no sleep

  • 9 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Judging comment:

    This is a very self-reflective piece where I feel you focus on how you have been affected by the weight of the world in different periods of your life. With these lines: "I lift, I shift, I am the one who degrades all that defies me" you seem to highlight how you are in control and only you can overcome the forces that try to bring you down, or take away your will/motives. Your style is unique, especially with the repetition of "Capture in bottles I", which gives me the image of you contemplating the many aspects of life in order to analyze and appease tempers or certain evils of the world. The pattern of "from the rains the sprouting green" to "From wonder; consideration. From broken skin the mark of healing" reminds me of rebirth and I agree that we must see the dark before we can truly recognize the light. Your voice has a clear tone here with the emphasis that suffering must come before healing and relief. The ending lines intrigue me and how I interpret it is that we are all "afflicted" whether physically or spiritually or even mentally. It is the burden we carry but it does not define our character, we do not become that sickness. A very enlightening poem! (4)

    • 9 years ago

      by Armada the Gestalt

      Wow, thanks very much! It means a lot to get an analysis like that, and it's very much what I was going for. I like things to speak for themselves (partly because if people were to 'misinterpret' with their own ideas, it doesn't bother me) but I'll just tell you that the 'sickness' in question was indeed for me depression. It's something I suffer from often, but at the time I also had actual issues to contend with but I felt more awake at the time (and in ways wanted to assure the 'me' who was going to be unwell soon that it does pass), so this is about that.

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Very well written, throughout. "I am many-fanged I capture my moods in glasses to drink in times of thirst" - had me hooked and a brilliant opening.
    All the best,