Comments : Nameless

  • 3 days ago

    by Em

    I'LL COMMENT INDEPTH AFTER WORK (the caps lock is for my benefit) take care

  • 2 days ago

    by Em

    The title 'Glimmer of sun' made me think of springtime when the sun gives us a glimmer of hope then disappears, unfortunately diminishing the little hope it gave us in the first place.

    Sometimes hope springs eternal within this
    ticking time bomb. Count downs become moot
    when glimmers of  sun peak through blinds to
    check in with depression.
    This opening is raw but relatable. I like the ticking time bomb line as it shows just what a mind can do to us as we're our own worse judge and to carry on through it is strong in its own right. The count downs, I presume are counting down the minutes until dawn and in all honesty I've done this alot when I've been at my lowest, wishing the night could have somehow taken me away.m but unfortunately I'm still here.

    Sighs of contentment
    begrudgingly leave lips not lusted in forever.
    Attractiveness often depended on the beer holder,
    but this time it feels safe, and secure like a heart
    kept under lock and key that wants to sing.
    The beginning here is so sombre, it's unreal. I felt this hard in the gut because it's hard to feel alone or be lonely and not wanted but we will all get someone in the end, some of us just need to be more patient. I did giggle at the line 'Attractiveness often depended on the beer holder' as it is true for the most part but it doesn't mean we're less attractive to others when they're sober. The imagery in this stanza was beautiful!

    Perhaps testimonials reflect a versus moment
    that is often reserved. Words are my silver
    tongued devil that are stuttered while spoken
    to souls only aquamarine eyes can swim in.
    Again, the imagery here is astounding and this is my favourite part of the piece in whole.

    Drowning is not a proposal thought about yet
    however, my cheeks burn with sunsets each day.
    This ending is very raw, to me it states your not thinking of drowning (linking it back to the 'aquamarine eyes can swim in' line) yet you say your cheeks burn with sunsets each day which links to the line 'sun peak through blinds to
    check in with depression.' and this shows that depression is there but possibly not to an extent you have had it before, though I could be wrong.

    I like the rawness in this, although sombre, it's beautifully written.
    Em x