The frist stanza you have no punctuation and in the rest you do.

Also I thought the rhyming was weird. First stanza doesn't, rest does. It just felt like an inconsistant poem to me.

The idea was good though. And I liked the mentioning of waking to blank walls in the fist stanza.

The rhyming stanzas were really good as well.

The last line was powerful. I liked that.

Overall I just wish the poem was more consistant. I'll give it a four.

Okay loving this poem, but in the frist stanza you had no punctuation but in the rest u do.

but flow was a little off, but overall the poem was great and i really enjoyed reading it.

The first stanza is the most powerful of all the others. . . . "Alas you're here to be as a living dream
No longer existing in my nightmare so sweet
TO DREAM OF ONE SUCH AS YOU THEN WAKE TO BLANK WALLS IS BUT A CURSE I'M FORCED TO ACCEPT"

that was my favorite lines.....i know that feeling. i'm engaged and i feel that feeling every morning i wake up to go to college and don't have him beside me. Thank you for the amazing collaboration you and your love did. it was truely a beautiful write.....
thanks
~*~Amber~*~
check out my work sometime.....