Comments : Playing In The Snow

  • 10 years ago

    by xxxStarSxxx

    What a cute poem! The rythm of the couplets is perfect except for the first and fifth couplet. Other than that, well done. 4/5
    Stefanie

  • 10 years ago

    by ether

    It is, perhaps, a little too Daddy Mommy.
    The repetition of those names in the poem I think loses some of the innocence that it's meant to hold. I'm not too sure why, but if it had less I think it'd sound more like a child.

    Though you did do a good job at making it sound like a small child talking (or writing?).
    And the idea of this is sweet. :)

    4/5

    jess ~

  • 10 years ago

    by mandy

    Very nice, 5/5, very touching.

    -mandy :)

  • 10 years ago

    by sezz

    Awww such a cute poem, very interesting way of writing, simply amazing

  • 10 years ago

    by nikki

    Wow. you made me want to go to the snow with my family, although i have never seen nor touched snow, the way you wrote about this piece was awesome. you put it in such a short piece but really got the message across on how much fun it was for you. very nice piece. 5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    Very well written it reminds me of the old childcraft books I used to love

  • 10 years ago

    by HidinVictim

    This is cute, I'm not to big on friendship, or family poetry, but this wasn't bad at all... the flow was great, and the imagery was lovely. I surprisingly liked how short the stanzas were, there seemed small and innocent like the piese, your word gave the whole piece a sense of innocence, and childhood joy great job with that one... 5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Dark Savior

    I'm very happy to read this poem. I love it, I enjoyed reading it, but it also did something that a lot of poems on here don't, brought you back to a happy time.

    Let's go out and play on the snow.
    Le's go see it fall.

    -second line should be let's

    Other than that I wouldn't change a thing, I think it's a wonderful poem, You could probably argue that the syllables are off..but does it take away from the poem? not even a bit.

    5/5

    AWESOME JOB!

  • 10 years ago

    by Brittany C

    I liked this poem, I love nature poems. Umm, line two "le's" should be "Let's". Other then that I see nothing wrong with it. This is a poem that probably almost everyone could relate to in some way. 5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Alexandra Jade Brewer

    Wow, I love this it. It is completely adorable. I think you tied every thing together really well :) This poem is really good and I wouldn't change a thing...

    But the second line should be "let's" instead of le's
    Well done 5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Mister 47

    Family the most important thing you can think of , very well writen !

    i understand why you writen this poem ,

    it touched me too and it showed the affection you have , great poem i enjoyed readin it
    keep it up too !

  • 10 years ago

    by Bianca The Queen Of Hearts

    That made tears come up in my eyes...brought back long buried memories of someone... good job!

  • 10 years ago

    by Nobody

    Awe so sweet! i really liked very cute 5/5