"A ravaged heart hung by fear"

A very entrancing beginng line, your descriptions here are wonderful and have me reading on.

"Clich�©d lines surround your soul"

Just delete that a thingy, I think you meant "cliche lines surround your soul". Great wording here too.

"Unoriginal, plain and logical
Conquer the unbeatable"

Good flow so far, I love the meaning here.

"Defeat all that�s broken"

Just delete that a thingy.

"Reflected memories blind your eyes"

Again, love your descriptive words and how you managae to pull the reader in. "Reflected memories" was just brilliant.

"Now your bleeding out full of lies"

This didn't sound right with "of" in it, just take out that word "of", and it will read better.

"Words won�t satisfy a hungry heart"

Just delete that a thingy and replace it with "won't". This was a great ending, I loved the whole concept.

4/5 from me, keep writing, always and forever.

~MaryAnne