What an absolutely beautiful poem, I actually got chills shooting through my back when I read the last stanza. This poem thus further confirmed why you are bright star among my favorite poets on this site.
5 years ago
by average thoughts
D way dis poem starts wid such a beautiful scenery..
Wow, peter..i wish i cud rhyme like u.
Bt seriously, i didnt like d end..i mean i dnt like sad endings..bt dis poem ..awesum..pure beauty
5 years ago
Great poem, great Rhymes hence your post about rhyming, however, (I didn't want to use BUT)
First line of second stanza doesn't read right "me to leave" should 'me' be there or am I missing the point?
Should it be "to leave me?" which then doesn't rhyme with grieve.
I write poetry in an old fashioned 'romanticised' way of placing words together, and in this style,
'if you were ever me to leave' is entirely appropriate for this writing style.
'If you were to leave me', would not be right for this 'romaticised' poem. (far too 21st Century!)
My style of words is much in keeping with Poets of 100 or so years ago.
(it's not that I emulate their style, but words 'just come out of me' that way, very 'romanticised' and old fashioned.)
Wordsworths poem with his words, 'I wandered lonely as a cloud' is written in a similar 'romanticised' style.
I guess I'm just an old fashioned poet when it comes to words!
Stunning images you have painted with your words. The ending is a bit sad.
5 years ago
England I thought I commented this before. I read it again tonight in a less noisy environment and saw it in a brand new light. It was nice to read you again my friend. Whoever this is written for sure is a lucky lady to have such a beautiful poem written about her :)Really great rhyme and flow and it had a tranquil easy feel to it. Rhyme on Peter!
Raw motives, pure intentions, I like your imagination! Thanks for sharing a little bit of your thoughts, I delved right into your mind and could envisage the beauty of such special moment. Great piece PP!
This wonderfully written. Its flow and language a joy to read.
A tribute to love. A love that is wholesome. But, with all love it has that fear of being without it.
A great poem Peter.
2 years ago
by Ben Pickard
The more I read your work, the more I realise that you and I share a love for rhyming romantic poetry - the kind not seen too often in these unromantic times of ours.
This is a stunning little piece that was a real pleasure to read.....and read again!
All the very best