Comments : Ela

  • 4 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    My heart melissa my heart....my beautiful melissa...

    I can't, I can't..

  • 4 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    Oh my word.

    I haven't read poetry for a while and what a poem to come back to!

    This embodies everything that I love about your work-depth, emotion, imagery, feeling, heart and soul.

    I don't have a clue what I could say that would do justice to this.

    I agree with what others have said recently-that you seem to be developing a new style; writing with les metaphors and more emotion, openness, rawness-and you pull it off perfectly.

    "that I had been writing myself
    skinless for the wrong person"

    This reminds me of self harm; whether physical, mental or emotional. I'm probably wrong, but it reminds me how so often we destroy ourselves for the ones that either don't notice or care about us.

    "I wrote
    about Paris you slept restlessly
    beside me,"

    ^^This reminds me of your "Paris" poem (which is and always will be a favourite of mine from you) and I wonder if this was an intentional reference?

    "I still don't know."

    The melancholy here, be still my heart. You seem so lost, so alone and it tugs at the heart.

    Your next stanza is my favourite, for how often do we put barriers between our loved ones? But what I love here is that it isn't you that started this, only that you went step further and constructed every type of defence possible in return.

    I adore the "ela", I'm always a fan of other languages, especially when it's so short/simple words and sentences yet adds so much emotion to the poem.

    I love this.

  • 4 years ago

    by Illusion

    Excellence.... That's all I could say.. Elaaaaaaaaaaaaa........ Where are u?

  • 4 years ago

    by Britt

    We've already talked about the meaning off site so I'm not going to go into that, and really we talked about my love for this poem, lol.. so I more so commented better through texting than I am here. I just wanted to highlight again that I absolutely love this poem and the emotion in it. There's a sense of longing, but not the usual way... It's like you want this person to be changed to who they used to be, but not necessarily the same person they were to you before.. if that makes sense. Beautiful poem, front page worthy and I hope I see it up there :)

  • 4 years ago

    by Hellon

    From your title I first thought it was a girls name but, I really didn't think you'd be writing about a female so..I stopped by and, I'm glad I did.

    The opening stanza was short but it was enough to make me curious...obviously something had upset her...the reader could tell that straight away.

    Net two stanzas tell us a whole lot...you want to let this person go but, still you cannot because, when you read back on your older poems this person was a huge part of them and...you were inspired by them (for whatever reason back then.)

    I use to follow you into sleepless *used
    nights, tiled floors and those
    hours waiting for you to come
    home, to where?

    This stanza had me guessing slightly...perhaps this place was not the original home for either of you?

    I'd call and call ("ela ela")
    but you'd not come.

    To be honest...I'm really not sure about the second line here...I think, by saying but you didn't come or wouldn't come would strengthen it a bit more...just a thought.

    I like the repetition at the end and I note that you have changed I to we for the finish.

    I said a while ago that your poetry is becoming more open with less metaphors but...I do appreciate both styles so...I enjoyed this one also...

  • 4 years ago

    by Hellon

    From your title I first thought it was a girls name but, I really didn't think you'd be writing about a female so..I stopped by and, I'm glad I did.

    The opening stanza was short but it was enough to make me curious...obviously something had upset her...the reader could tell that straight away.

    Net two stanzas tell us a whole lot...you want to let this person go but, still you cannot because, when you read back on your older poems this person was a huge part of them and...you were inspired by them (for whatever reason back then.)

    I use to follow you into sleepless *used
    nights, tiled floors and those
    hours waiting for you to come
    home, to where?

    This stanza had me guessing slightly...perhaps this place was not the original home for either of you?

    I'd call and call ("ela ela")
    but you'd not come.

    To be honest...I'm really not sure about the second line here...I think, by saying but you didn't come or wouldn't come would strengthen it a bit more...just a thought.

    I like the repetition at the end and I note that you have changed I to we for the finish.

    I said a while ago that your poetry is becoming more open with less metaphors but...I do appreciate both styles so...I enjoyed this one also...

  • 4 years ago

    by Abed

    This is incredibly magnificently moving and vivid and... ugh... I can't express it well.. It tastes like those extravagantly sad French movies.

    Perfecto!

  • 4 years ago

    by Meme

    I am in freakin' love with this poem!! One of the best I have ever read in this site. It is raw and moving and perfect and beyond anything I read in a long looooong while.

    You have penned an image that will haunt anyone who comes to read this piece.

    Epic
    xoxo

  • 4 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    <3 must

  • 4 years ago

    by Chelsey

    Mel, I have tears in my eyes and goosebumps on my arms after reading this. By far, one of your greatest poems. Please never delete this, and if you do send me a copy. I saved it in my faves but often times poets delete their accounts then i never see it again.

    The parts about Paris, the parts about what you had to put between you....amazing stanzas, amazing wording, amazing tone...just Incredibly flawless..

    I have not felt this strongly, so in Love with a poem in such a long time.

    The heartbreak here, the loss, the melodic rhythm this carries, it really makes the reader feel like they already know the story, without even knowing.

    I'd be damn proud of this write Mel. I am for you. I find you took one word, Greek at that, and made it totally captivating.

    Incredible.

  • 4 years ago

    by Redangelwings

    I love how you used the title here. It is so well written and inside I feel so many emotions. I love all the details about the love you have for this person. You say they are your first love poem and that is very lovely. I feel like you are saying you dont like being anywhere without this person. The details are so well written here that the you suck the reader into the poem. We all can feel like we are there.

    You dont know where your true home lies and you don't know if you love this person. Are they your real home? That's what leaves the reader guessing I think. You and this person seem to be falling apart and there is war going on inside you. The tone is very strong indeed. You leave so many things for the reader to think about.

    I love the ending too. You make the point there. You had to get away from this person so thats why Paris is written. I love the under tones there. People say Paris is a romantic city but this person feels so alone. Everyone is worried but you just want to be alone here. I love everything about this. 5/5