This is a much better poem,, loved the end,, very good,, take care,, oh and read some of mine pls,, if u dont mind,, thx,, 5/5
**doz an1c me**

Great poem. it nearly brought a tear to my eye!!! well done 5/5
love jess XXX

Hmmmm.....I loooooved the whole rhythm and rhyming scheme..very nicely done...

I guess I just didn't get the ending....contradiction??? Idk...could you explain it a bit more??

Still...LOVELY poem!! Thanks for sharing!!!!!!!

I definitely agree with Laura..
I also, DEFINITELY LOOOOOVED the changes you made..
The rhyming scheme was catchy and flawless....PERFECT!!
You nailed this one, amazing amazing....

Please...continue to try out this style...this poem was incredible!!!! So heartfelt. I LOVED it...it had me on the edge of my seat.
GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!

Hey iu like it..keep it up

Unm... YUMMY!!! i like its lots. its really really good. it's just soo perfect i'm SPEECHLESS!! i want to see lots and lots more from you love ya lots