Too powerful..honestly.
this was dark and a real kick.

liked it..great job
take care and all the best
5/5

You've written an orginal masterpiece here... solid structure and excellent wording through-out.

Keep Up The Good Work!
JM

Lol... well... um... my dark poems have lots of pracitse and they pretty much suck compared to this! lol... great job!.... btw ur beautiful! dn't put yourself down.. different people find different people attractive... I reckon i'm ugly but my best friend reckons she is and I'm pretty and she's stunning so... *Shrugs* ANYWAYS!! good job hun keep it up!

This is great, and it is very dark and depressing.You really create such a milieu out of the mood and emotion that you have imbued this poem with.(personally I love storms and the exhilaratuion they bring, plus the cleansing effect, sleeping with the rythmn of the drops hitting the window or roofs, or leaves on the tree-I see rainy days as something I love(and have wrote of numerous times-but I like this opposite take on it, and I realize I have seen it in this perspective also.Your words paint a wonderful picture of thought and emotion and mood))Excellent use of language, nice flow, a brutal honesty, the feeling of a day full of gray skies, the wish to be washed away(cleansed, start afresh).Most of my stuff is a bit dark, but more melancholy.This really captures the deep darkness and desperation, the pain and resignation.This is beautifully written.Remember though, behind the dark rain clouds, the sun is waiting to shine down on you in warmth and happiness and bring light and love back to your life.

Pure greatness. The way that you carried the main idea/keyword of the last sentence of the previous stanza into the first sentence of the next one is brilliant. It adds a unique flow that connects the entire poem to itself.

Nice job!

XD

The structure of your poem, the wording, dark and amazing!! And you think you're an amateur at this. (lol!) You're a pro in my book.

Very powerfully written peice. to read this no one would think that you were an "amatur" at the dark stuff, it is very good.

Beautiful

You did a superb job my friend with this write. The structure, diction and flow were flawless. Very dark and depressing. Keep up the good work.

Best regards,

Steve