Comments : Children of the World

  • 11 years ago

    by Cayce

    Awww.. That was really sad. It made me think of all the poor kids who have to go through that. It was very good! I loved it! Great Job!

  • 11 years ago

    by Natalie

    I'm really glad I've read this. It was so good. And, sometimes it's hard to find a good poem about kids that are really going through tough stuff. You did a wonderful job on this. Not a thing I would change! Keep it up! 5/5

    `Taleee. xx.

  • 11 years ago

    by Sean Allen

    "We, nor a slave nor to play"
    Improper use of 'nor' has made this line really confusing. Does it mean "We are neither a slave nor to play"? I'm not sure what that is supposed to mean.
    ~~~
    "Our life deserves more than media attention
    Everyday our bodies grow more lifeless"
    I thought life and lifeless were used too closely together, and that detracted from the rhythm of the poem by sounding awkward.
    ~~~
    "Our heart hopes for better days
    Hoping that day is today"
    same problem as above only with hope and hoping. how about replacing hope with yearn?
    ~~~
    Very nice poem, excellent imagery and rhyming.

  • 11 years ago

    by Arcane Blondie

    Really good poem----sad but good 5/5 keep it up!

  • 11 years ago

    by Jessica

    Awww.. i think im gonna cry.. this was soo sad.. i think i might write a poem about this too.. if we all do, then maybe some people will pay attention.. this was really well written.. and it really touched my heart..

    We are neither a slave nor to play
    ^ i dont think this really makes sense.. or if it does, i dont understand..

    nice job, very well written write with a lot of meaning! 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Dre4meR

    Very Nicely Written...Nice Job

  • 11 years ago

    by Jordan

    Oh, oh wow, I like this a lot! Such a delicate topic and written so well! I fin this to be a very sad poem...especially the last two stanzas. I keep picturing the poor children with a terrible look of sorrow on their poor little faces.

    Awesome.

  • 11 years ago

    by Bridgette

    That's a very sad poem and definitely an eye opener. It seems to have captured emotions of helplesness and hope all at the same time. Great job on this. Flow, rhythm, wording, rhyme, it was all good. 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by â—ŠJâ—Š

    Amzing poem..I really loved to read it...and its so true wut u say..great job
    5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by loretta Taylor

    Totally awesome. I have worked with kids who have had much abuse in there lives. Your poem is a testament to them. thank you for writing it

  • 11 years ago

    by loretta Taylor

    Totally awesome. I have worked with kids who have had much abuse in there lives. Your poem is a testament to them. thank you for writing it

  • 11 years ago

    by redLatina

    Nice poem...i like it a lot....great job!!!

  • 11 years ago

    by Anton

    Greate poem!

  • 11 years ago

    by Lu

    Mercy, this poem is touching . Your words shout loud and clear and create imagery that makes my heart tear.

    A definate heart-touching piece Noni !

  • 11 years ago

    by brittany west

    This poem is really heart touching, it makes wanna stop our busy lifes and help just one hurting child. it really speaks to me!! good job!!

  • 11 years ago

    by BrokenSoul

    Wow that was sooo good... I can see why everyone likes it defornately...
    5/5 All the way!

  • This poem is super good, it is really good that u can write about topics like this, for the people who cant stand up for themselves, or don't get the chance to.

  • 11 years ago

    by Carissa

    This was good

  • 11 years ago

    by Vampire Bunny

    Wow this was a really great poem.Every word had so much menaing....it hit a soft spot in my heart. Keep up the great work!
    **Bunny**

  • 11 years ago

    by I - O - W - A

    From The Heart, If You Have Not Been In SOme Sort Of Volotile Situation Or You Have An Extreamly Good Understanding Of PPls Suffering Made Me Cry